Barry's Journey

Our journey continues

2008-08-11T22:11:00.004-04:00

The garden at St. John's United Church of Christ in Catonsville, Maryland

Barry’s life partner Rick and Barry’s family in Baltimore would like to express heartfelt thanks for the expressions of kindness, love, and support that they have received during this most difficult time. The memorial services in Jacksonville and in Baltimore were beautiful and moving tributes. Other memorial gatherings were held and masses, condolences and memorial donations have been offered by people who knew and loved Barry.

Barry left us with an understanding of how important it is to live life fully, to make the most of the time that is granted to us, and to cherish the people who are dear to us. Barry mentioned a passage from the Confessions of St. Augustine that he wanted to be shared at his memorial. A copy of that passage is included here.

“And friendship had other joys to captivate my heart. We could talk and laugh together and exchange small acts of kindness. We could join in the pleasure that books can give. We could trifle together. If we sometimes disagreed, it was without spite, as a man might differ with himself, and the rare occasions of dispute were the very spice to season our mutual accord. Each of us had something to learn from the others and something to teach in return. If any were away, we missed them with regret and gladly welcomed them when they came home. Such things as these are heartfelt tokens of affection between friends. They are signs to be read on the face and in the eyes, spoken by the tongue and displayed in countless acts of kindness. They can kindle a blaze to melt our hearts and meld them into one.”

- From the confessions of St. Augustine, Book IV

The garden plaque at St. John's

Memorial Services

2008-07-30T22:00:00.007-04:00

The following notice will be posted in the newspapers in Jacksonville and Baltimore.

Barry Jay Whiteley, 50, Jacksonville, Florida, passed away peacefully in his home Tuesday, July 29, 2008. He was born December 13, 1957 in Baltimore, MD. Mr. Whiteley earned a degree in mathematics and economics in 1979 from Western Maryland College (currently known as McDaniel College) in Maryland. Mr. Whiteley thoroughly enjoyed his 25 year career as Principal Consultant for Ascension Health Information Technology which is associated with St. Vincent's Hospital in Jacksonville. He also worked as a Principal Consultant for Computer Sciences Corporation for 4 years. Barry's passion and excitement for his work was contagious and his enthusiasm motivated all who worked with him.

Barry is predeceased by his wonderful grandmother Katherine Cronise of Maryland for whom he held the greatest esteem.

Barry is survived by his life partner, Richard Overton of Jacksonville, Barry's mother, Dolores Catherine Schuhart, stepfather, Charles Harris Schuhart of Catonsville, MD. He also has six surviving siblings, brothers Stephen Kenneth Whiteley, Charles Harris Schuhart III, and Terry Dean Whiteley as well as sisters Christine Lynne Combs, Charlotte Anne Rouseau, and Sandra Christina Bertanomi all of Maryland.

A memorial service will be held in Jacksonville, Florida on Sunday, August 3, 2008 at 11:00 a.m. at The River House on King St. and the St. Johns River across from the St. Vincent's Medical Center. All friends and family are invited to attend to share your humorous or heartwarming experiences you've had with Barry.

A memorial service will also be held in Catonsville, Maryland on Saturday, August 9, 2008 at 10:00 a.m. in the garden of St. John's United Church of Christ.

Casual dress for both services is appropriate.

In lieu of flowers, memorial donations may be made to the Jacksonville Humane Society or Saint John's United Church of Christ, 1000 South Rolling Road, Catonsville, Maryland 21228.

The Journey Ends

2008-07-29T11:58:00.000-04:00

This morning at 7:08, Barry's journey ended. He died peacefully at home of cardiac arrest with me at his side. The EMTs had been summoned, but Barry was ready for his journey to end. Memorial Services will be held here in Jacksonville in Barry's garden as well as one in Baltimore. Dates are undetermined at this time, but we will post the information on this blog as soon as possible. Both services will be soon. To all of you who have followed Barry's Journey, I thank you. He loved reading your comments and was delighted so many of you were interested in the Journey.

Rick

Hallowe’en now and then

2008-07-27T15:42:00.001-04:00

When we were kids we would go up and down the street collecting candy in brown paper bags. We were dressed in various costumes but there were two that we always tried to use that were made by grandmother years ago. One was a bum and one was a devil costume. They were used by our uncles and Mom and if we could use them we would.

When we got back to the house we would dump out all of our candy and we would re-choose it after Mom and Dad took out all the unsafe candy. We were allowed to have one piece a day until the candy disappeared – which often took until Thanksgiving. Our candy lasted quite a long time.

Halloween in Jacksonville involves buying quite a bit of candy because we get a lot of trick-or-treaters. We try to be generous with the trick-or-treaters and usually the candy will last all night. We’ll get anywhere from 75 to 100 trick-or-treaters which we feel is quite a few. Luckily when we run out they are pretty understanding.

Concerts when I was young

2008-07-24T19:59:00.000-04:00

I went to a number of concerts in Baltimore when I was in my teens. Many may be surprised to find I went to several concerts by Johnny and June Carter Cash, the Carter Family and Mother Maybelle Carter. These were at the Painters Mills Music Fair, an in the round musical venue in Owings Mills. A good friend of mine was a country music fan and we attended these together. I enjoyed these more than I thought I would.

At the Merriweather Post Pavilion, an outdoor concert venue in Columbia, Maryland, a number of friends went to several Linda Ronstadt concerts when we were in college. Her concerts were excellent. Her voice was amazing. Unfortunately, we were always pretty far away and had difficulty seeing her. We would take picnic dinners and make an evening of it.

One time, my friend Betsy invited me to a concert at Merriweather Post Pavilion and I thought she said it was going to be James Brown. I said ok, we got there and I was pleasantly surprised to find it was Jackson Browne instead. He was still recording "Running on Empty" and the cut of "Stay" on that album was recorded the night we were there. Every time I hear that cut, I like to think that Betsy and I are singing our hearts out on it.

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Easter Egg and Irish Potato Candy Recipes

2008-07-23T20:52:00.001-04:00

I got the recipes for the Easter Eggs and Irish Potato candy from my dad. I hope you enjoy them.

Easter Eggs

1/4 lb butter
1 lb confectioners sugar
1 tablespoon real vanilla or other flavoring of your choice

You can add coconut flakes if you like.

Mix together in the shape of an egg.

Cover in room temperature melted chocolate. Bittersweet is best, but use milk if you prefer. Cool on wax paper.

Irish Potato Candy

Use the same recipe adding one cooled mashed potato to the mix. Many add coconut flakes to this also. Make smaller pieces than the full size Easter Eggs.

Coat candy with cinnamon.

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Hotel Adventure in Milwaukee

2008-07-23T18:49:00.003-04:00

Several years go, Maddie, Jim and I were working in Milwaukee. We often tried different hotels for variety and to experiment. I had eaten several times at the Knickerbocker on the Lak e. The food was quite good, it was in an excellent neighborhood on the edge of the lake.

I inquired and found it was also a hotel. The units were owned by individuals that then made them available for rental. I was assured the units all met quality standards so that we would be pleased with any unit that was selected for us. They were described as elegantly decorated one bedroom units.

After the three of us checked in, it became very clear that elegant is in the eye of the beholder. Jim was fortunate to end up with a unit that was actually quite nice. His had a bit of a 50's retro feel and he was pleased with his unit. His even had an iron.

Maddie's unit was a horror. The bedspread had a huge stain, the pictures were hung just inches from the ceiling as if the owner were a giant. The microwave was blocked by a cabinet. It was not an elegant experience for her.

As I recall, my unit was very drab with lots of brown. It also was not very conveniently arranged and I seemed to be rearranging constantly. It was not a place I would want to stay again.

The elevators were a bit of a challenge also. Everything about the place seemed to be a bit shabby and run down.

Parking was paid in advance, but you weren't guaranteed a spot. That made for interesting returns from work each day.

We learned our lesson that week and were much more careful about hotels in the future. It was very much a case of buyer beware.

The Carriage House

2008-07-22T20:58:00.008-04:00

I moved from the apartment in downtown Ellicott City to the Carriage House on the grounds of my church in 1998 after I returned from my trip to China. The church property is called Overhills and was built in 1897. There were many of these estates in this area of Catonsville located in the western suburbs of Baltimore. The High School, Community College and Golf Course are all located on former estates. When my church congregation bought the property in 1957, the descendants of the original family retained the corner of the property that contained the Carriage House and made it their home.

We used the Mansion as our church building until 1967 when we built a new church building elsewhere on the 32 acre property. The Mansion was then used by other community oganizations.

In 1998, the family indicated they were moving to New Jersey and offered my church first option to buy. After much consideration, we purchased the property to use as a retreat facility. The house contained an entry hall, a large living room, a dining room, a bathroom, a huge great room and kitchen, a laundry room and another large room on the ground floor. The second floor contained 7 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms on the second floor. There were two large porches, plus a deck in the back. There was also a swimming pool. The basement still contained the horse stalls from when it was a working carriage house. It was quite a house.

It was determined it would be helpful to have someone living there to keep an eye on the house. I volunteered to move into the house as that person. The rent was reasonable and it seemed like it would be an adventure. It took a lot of work to get the house to a state where it could be properly used. Floors needed to be refinished, walls painted, etc. There were LOTS of work parties with church members to get this done. Quite a few went late into the night with a few of us putting in countless hours.

Furnishing the Carriage House was a challenge also. Those 7 bedrooms held 16 beds. If every bed was full, that was 20 people. Church members donated beds, mattresses, linens, towels, etc. There were also donations of tables and chairs for the great room where guests would eat meals and hold meetings. Four dining tables fit in this large great room.

My furniture was used in the living room and we filled in the space with other appropriate pieces. I had just returned from China so a large oriental carpet graced the living room. The living room also had a fireplace that was used frequently.

My bathroom on the main floor. It was small, but we managed to find a really fun wallpaper by Susan Boynton, who had a large line of greeting cards. The wallpaper featured a lot of her characters, particularly the hippo, in various bathroom functions - shaving, showering, etc. It was fun and whimsical.

Once the house was completed, it was a joy to live here. Retreats typically took place on the weekends, other times I had the place to myself. I had a large room on the ground floor as my living quarters. . It served as my bedroom and office. It had five large windows and opened directly into the foyer. It had access to the back deck without disturbing those there for a retreat.

In the mornings I would often come out and find deer gathered in the driveway. I was only minutes from the airport which was quite handy for travel. I could get to BWI without hitting a traffic signal. I was also much closer to the office.

The kitchen was amazing to work in. I have never worked in a larger one. Lots of cupboard space, counter space and a pantry. I quickly became spoiled by the space and convenience.

We held the 25th wedding anniversary party for my parents here, setting up tables and chairs on the large driveway area and front porch. There were about 50 people and we all fit quite easily.

The front porch was a popular gathering place most any time of day. The driveway was lined with maples and locusts. The fragrance of the locusts in the spring was overwhelming and the colors of the maples in the fall was stunning.

We would also have our 4th of July crab feasts on the back deck.

The pool was a popular attraction. It was always refreshing in the evenings to take a dip in the cool of the evening.

Since the house sat in a heavily wooded corner of the property, I also had a lot of birds. I hung a finch feeder and was often treated to a large number of yellow finches on the feeder. It was always a battle with the squirrels, of course, to keep them off the various feeders.

At Christmas, I would put a large tree in the living room and cover it with lots of lights. It looked as if it were on fire there were so many lights. I always liked to take my glasses off to enjoy the lights on the tree as each light then looked like a little star. Try it sometime.

The Mansion has a history of weddings. The property was originally a wedding gift from a lumber merchant to his son. An addition was made many years later to hold a reception for a family member. Before the original family sold us the Carriage House, they asked if they could use the Mansion for their daughter's wedding reception. We agreed and the caterer they selected loved the space and asked to use it as their permanent catering location. The Mansion underwent a major renovation and has become a much sought after location for weddings, receptions and corporate functions. Everything old is new again.

The groups that used the Carriage House were usually church groups from the Baltimore area, but sometimes it would be guests for a wedding. One that sticks out in my mind was a large group from France. I studied French in school, but certainly could not keep up with these folks. The house was also fragrant with heavy perfume for days.

We smoked a turkey one time in the grill on the deck. It was the best turkey I think I ever had. We also made a lot of homemade ice cream there. There was nothing better than fresh strawberry ice cream.

Connie's family were my closest neighbors so we did a lot of socializing together. We shared many, many good times that have led to a very close lifelong friendship.

This house was perfect for entertaining. I can't remember how many cookouts and parties were held here. For New Years I was able to offer over night accommodations for anyone that needed it with all those bedrooms.

I loved to cook, but one particular dinner party turned out to be a disaster. I had invited several of my closest friends for dinner, Jim, Jim and Tracy. I made the mistake of serving dishes I had never tried before. What a huge mistake. I won't go through the menu with you. Suffice it to say they have not forgotten that dinner and neither have I. It was so bad, Domino's delivered.

I was involved in a lot of church activities. I was able to walk to church. One time we had a youth event for about 75 teenagers from New Jersey, Delaware, D.C. and parts of Maryland, Virginia and West Virginia. They slept at the church, but we used the Carriage House for some of the activities, especially the pool parties. I was much younger then and able to work with all those teenagers.

The pictures here were provided by my friend Connie. Connie did the catering for the Carriage house, providing three meals a day for those staying there. When I moved to Jacksonville in 1991, Connie also became the resident of the Carriage House.

The Carriage House property has since been sold to an assisted living facility called Brightview. The original Carriage House was torn down but the facility that was erected in its place is reminiscent of the Carriage House.

Those were wonderful years at the Carriage House. Quiet, peaceful, exciting and all the room in the world. What a memorable place it was to live.

The Evansville girls at the beach

2008-07-22T20:48:00.002-04:00

When Cindy, Linda and Janice were here they went out to enjoy the beach. They sent a few pictures that they have given me permission to share. It was a beautiful day at the beach and it looks like they had a great time.

The first picture is Linda and Cindy.

The second is Janice and Cindy.

I think they all look great.

Third round of chemotherapy complete

2008-07-22T19:56:00.000-04:00

Last night completed my third round of chemotherapy by pill. Once again, there were no side effects.
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Update on the Evansville visitors

2008-07-21T20:11:00.000-04:00

I got a call from the Evanville visitors, Linda, Cindy and Janice. They were around Clarksville. Weather was good and the return trip was going well for them. Rick and I wish them continued good weather and safe driving. We enjoyed their visit immensely.
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Out of town visitors

2008-07-20T14:55:00.000-04:00

I've had a number of out of town visitors this week. One I knew was coming, the others were a big surprise though Rick knew.

Wilma Newton had called to tell me she would be vacationing in Ponte Vedra just outside Jacksonville. We set a time for her to visit on Thursday. She stopped over with some casseroles, fruit and cheese which we greatly appreciated. We had a great visit. Wilma, thanks so much for stopping over and I hope the rest of your vacation was enjoyable.

The second visit was a complete surprise to me but had been arranged with Rick. Saturday afternoon I heard a knock at the door. I then saw a head in the window at the side of the living room. I thought it was a solicitor and thought "wow, that's pretty nervy". Rick went to the door and in through the living room into my room I see three other people coming in.

My mind still was not registering. Finally, I realize it was Cindy Hawes, Linda Clemmer and Janice Elwood. Cindy and Linda are part of my former team from Evansville, Janice is our MS4 and OmniBuyer contact at St. Mary's Medical Center in Evansville. They had driven down from Evansville to surprise me. They sure did that. Cindy said they got 45 mpg in her Pruis. They also brought a Tater Tot casserole from Diane Feyen, a former co-worker. We all had it for dinner and it was delicious. Thanks, Diane. We also enjoyed a friendship cake that Cindy had baked. To quote Rachael Ray, it was yummo.

We had a nice long visit Saturday night. They went to the beaches this morning and afternoon and will be back later today before heading back to Evansville Monday. What a wonderful surprise this has been.

Thanks to all of you for your love and support.
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Tales of Greece

2008-07-20T10:19:00.005-04:00

We took a trip to Greece and Italy in August of 1996. The group included Rick, me, Doris - a co worker of Rick, and Betsy - an English professor friend of Doris. This will be divided into two blog entries since it will be so long. We'll do Greece first, then Italy.

The trip was three weeks. We spent two weeks in Greece, one in Italy. It would be longest time Rick and I had ever spent together due to my travel.

We stayed at the Hotel Attalos. Everyone there seemed to be named Kostas. At the time, it was a student hotel. A friend of Betsy's arranged the itinerary for us using one she used to take student groups to Greece. The hotel had very comfortable rooms. The elevator was small, but worked. It would hold two people or one with luggage. Rooms were air conditioned, but you needed to insert the plastic tag from the room key to turn it on. This meant the air conditioning wouldn't be running when you were not in the room. It turned out this tag was the size of a credit card. That made it easier to cool the room off.

Just as New York has the garment district, the diamond district, so does Athens. This area turned out to be the hardware district. It was also within walking distance of the Acropolis. An amazing location for such an inexpensive hotel. I recall it was only about fifty dollars per night. Since our trip started in Athens, took us to Rhodes then back to Athens, we stayed at the Attalos twice. The first stay we didn't have a balcony but the second time we had a rather large balcony. Each time, our rooms did adjoin.

The first night we were there, we took time to attend a traditional dance performance at the Acropolis and to see the light show performed nightly on the Parthenon. In a stroke of luck, my college roommate Rolf and his partner Dominic were also going to be there before they started their own vacation in Greece. I hadn't seen them in some time and had to come to Greece to see them. The dance performance was great. We all commented that the light show needed the Disney touch. The light show was set to triumphant music but the light show itself was nothing more than red to white and back again. It needed help.

There was a farmers market around the corner that we would frequent for fresh fruit. Betsy tried to buy a smaller amount than the vendor wanted to sell. His response was "no two, no two". We had to buy more.

Also just down the street was the most amazing bakery. All kinds of baklava and other pastries, but the one we thought most beautiful were birds nests of the shredded wheat type pastry coated with honey and filled with pignoles (pine nuts) that resembled birds eggs. We would often buy pastries to take back to the hotel or take then with us during the day.

Breakfast was provided each morning. We would all gather for the thick, Greek yogurt, honey, olives, feta and bread the hotel provided. We would often supplement with the fruit we would get at the farmers market. The peaches were always the best, but the apricots were very good also. We would also prepare for the day by reviewing our itinerary. Betsy, ever the teacher, would have prepared by checking out the Frommer's Guide. We teased her when we heard her say "Frommer says" but her information was always spot on and helped us better enjoy the day.

One of the best features of the hotel was the rooftop lounge and garden. Each evening, we would return to the hotel, put our card in the air conditioning slot, go to the rooftop and enjoy the view and revisit the day. We could see the Acropolis on one side, Mt. Lycabettus on the other. Mt. Lycabettus is the highest point in Athens.

At the base of the Acropolis is a neighborhood called the Plaka. It is the oldest neighborhood in Athens. Most roads are closed to traffic. It is a residential, restaurant, shopping, cultural and archaeological area all at one time. Some of the stores are quite nice, we bought some wonderful pottery there. There were also a lot of jewelry stores that Doris and Betsy enjoyed frequenting, particularly for silver and amber pieces. There were also enough low end stores that we referred to the area as the "schloka". There were so many cats wandering the area; we called them the "Acropicats"

We had several tours arranged. The first was to Delphi. As we were waiting on the bus, a woman got on the bus dressed in very body fitting clothing and very high espadrilles that laced quite far up her legs. She did not appear to be dressed for a full day of touring. Imagine our surprise when we found out this was our tour guide. It turns out she was certified in eight languages and was the best tour guide we experienced on the entire trip. I guess the old adage truly applies, never judge a book by its cover.

The tour of Delphi took us up multiple levels of the mountainside. We started in an ancient agora or market place. As we went up the mountainside there were more and more levels. There was the treasury building on one, the "navel of the earth" at another, finally concluding with a large amphitheater at the top.

The next tour was a three island tour. The first island stop was Aegina. It features a monastery that started construction in 1904. It is still under construction. It was magnificent. The next island was known for its pistachios. They were wonderful, but the pistachio ice cream was less than tasty. By the third island we were content to stay on board.

All the restaurants where we ate had wonderful food. Vegetables in Athens tasted better than any vegetables we had ever had. One memorable meal in the Plaka was for Doris' birthday. She had a whole snapper prepared Greek style at a restaurant called Miltons. All of our meals were excellent, but we ate and drank to Doris' health that night.

We're off to Rhodes next. When we boarded the Olympic Airlines flight to Rhodes, we reached cruising altitude. This was a smoking flight and most of the people on board not only smoked, they also had those very loud lighters. It sounded like everyone was lighting up with the old fashioned Zippo lighters at one time.

When we got to the hotel, we were about an hour late. The front desk person looked up our reservation and said "you're late". We thought it odd they cared about one hour. It turns out either Sue made an error or the hotel did. They had been expecting us on another day. Luckily they were able to squeeze us in that night and then moved us to better rooms the next night. The bathrooms in the better rooms always seemed to flood, but we dealt with it.

The ancient city of Rhodes dates from the time of the Crusades. The Crusaders Palace is one of the key historical sites here. The city walls are ancient. Imagine our surprise to find a hole cut into one of the walls and an ATM machine inserted into the wall. I don't think that would happen in the U.S.

At the waters edge there were lots of windmills. This always reminded me of the Walt Disney movie called "The Moonspinners". There were also lots of pastry shops with seating that ran almost to the edge of the water. There must have been ten of them in a row. It was fashionable to go in the evening for dessert, coffee or a drink. We soon discovered that most of the offerings from each place tasted the same.

One evening we ate at a restaurant that was on a second level. As we looked down on the town square below, it appeared as if we were sitting in an Epcot showcase of nations for Greece if one existed. Everything was so representative of Greece it looked perfectly suited for that. That evening was also the first and last time I ate smoked octopus.

We took a tour of Lindos, known for butterflies, pebbled floors and donkeys. The only way to the Acropolis in Lindos is by foot or donkey taxi service. Rick and Doris rode the donkeys, Betsy and I walked. We were constantly approached by elderly women selling laces and linens on the sidewalk. It was often difficult to walk without stepping on them. Most people walk back down as the donkeys know they will be fed and they sometimes move a little faster than people care for.

The oldest synagogue in Greece is in Lindos. We did take the opportunity to visit it. It was worth the time.

One evening as we were walking the shopping district, some china caught our eyes. To this day, Doris and Betsy say it took us until midnight to select our plates as they are all different. We still use them on special occasions.

As we explored the ancient city one day, we discovered a dressmaker that was a favorite of Dame Margot Fonteyn, the great ballerina. Doris bought a beautiful evening garment from the dressmaker. She still wears it still.

One of the interesting options at one of the restaurants we enjoyed was the chance to pick out the fish you wanted to eat that night. Talk about fresh.

At one point, Betsy purchased something where she made the comment that when she got home she would have to rearrange. Rick and I pointed out that we don't rearrange, we redecorate.

Rick and I took a day trip to Marmaris, Turkey while Doris and Betsy went to the Valley of the Butterflies. Upon our arrival in Marmaris, Rick and I went to the Turkish Baths. What an experience. Hot baths with a rubdown, sitting in the steamroom ending with a massage. Talk about being pampered.

Next we went to the street market and purchased spices, especially saffron. Rick's mom had requested a red leather purse and we found the perfect one for her. She loved it when we gave it to her.

Next, we went to look at carpets. We happened upon a carpet store run by someone with the name Attila. He invited us to sit down, enjoy sweet apple tea and then proceeded to show us hundreds of carpets. They were even bringing them in from his other store for us to review. We finally selected two, both still in our living room. Our previous cocker spaniel, Dulcie, enjoyed the tassles a bit too much as has Margo.

As we took a taxi back to the port to return to Rhodes, we ran into difficulty with the taxi driver. There was a torn corner on the U.S. five dollar bill we used to pay the fare. We finally convinced him it was ok to accept.

The mode of transportation to get from Rhodes to Marmaris is hydrofoil. The trip over was uneventful. The return trip was quite rough. The seas were difficult and the ride quite bumpy. I rather enjoyed it, but since most of the other passengers did not I kept my enjoyment to myself.

It was good we didn't spend too much time in Turkey. We would have never been able to figure out how much anything cost. The exchange was one U.S. dollar to 80,000,000 Turkish lira.

We returned to Athens and went to the Changing of the Guard at the Tomb of the Unknowns. It was a moving experience.

Our last tour was to the Temple of Poseiden. This temple is perched on high on a hill perched above the Aegean Sea. The view is spectacular. On the back of the temple, Lord Byron has carved his name. Not a good example for the graffiti artists.

This completed our trip to Greece. I know this was quite a long entry, but hope you enjoyed it. Perhaps a trip to Greece may be in your future.

A picture of the quilt

2008-07-19T11:22:00.000-04:00

When I wrote the posting last night about the quilt, I neglected to include a picture of the quilt Rick received from his unit. I've already had several requests for one. Here is a picture Rick and the beautiful quilt they gave him.
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Rick's retirement party

2008-07-18T23:23:00.002-04:00

Rick had his retirement party today. Quite a large number of people attended. The unit of people he supervised arranged to have a custom quilt created for him. The quilt maker is the same person that created the quilt that have on our bed.

The older quilt was designed to match a print hanging over our bed. It is a Mondrian painting that we saw when traveling to Amsterdam. We'll fill you in on all the remaining travels another time.

The new quilt matches the current quilt in tone and color. It is a beautiful and thoughtful gift.

Have a great weekend.

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Snowballs and Easter Eggs

2008-07-18T00:27:00.001-04:00

I’ve mentioned many of the recipes that Grandmother and Mom would prepare but I have totally forgotten until now that Dad had two recipes that we would love every year. At Easter he would make Easter eggs, vanilla or coconut covered with rich dark chocolate. Mary Sue move over.

But the best were the snowballs. Whenever there would be a deep, clean snow it would be gathered and a combination of milk, sugar and vanilla would be added to it. And voilà, we would have home made snowballs. I can still taste them now.

Oncologist appointment today

2008-07-16T18:00:00.002-04:00

We did meet with my oncologist today. He is confident that my last round of chemo was successful. I will be starting another round of oral chemo this evening. The first two rounds had no adverse side effects and we anticipate that with the third round starting tonight.

This does not change the statistical prognosis of nine to twelve months that I received two months ago. We realize that this is just the statistical prognosis and hope that there will be more time than that.

Rick and I all along have indicated that quality, not quantity of life is what is important to us. We realize that there are always miracles and we do continue to pray for them as you do. But our outlook has always been to look at the statistical but pray for a miracle.

I continue to feel great. Our days are full of therapy, appointments, visitors, and time to ourselves. So we are making the most of every day as we hope you are.

Being prepared

2008-07-16T17:58:00.002-04:00

Before I started any foreign travel, I made sure all my legal documents were in place – my will, my powers of attorney, my living will. Before Rick and I did any foreign travel, we had all of our legal documents revised to include both of our wills, living wills, durable powers of attorney, and health care surrogate documents. I know that these are often topics that people don’t discuss or that they put off. I would encourage you, if you don’t have these legal documents in place, to consider taking care of that for your family’s peace of mind and for your own. There are now software packages, web sites, and of course attorneys that are more than happy to take care of these items for you. What may be required can vary from state to state and that’s always appropriate to investigate also.

I know that many people when they started sending emails in response to my blog have indicated that they have scheduled physician appointments that they had been putting off or that they had been reviewing their workload or their family time - and that’s certainly appropriate. But please make sure that you and your family are protected legally.

Our Christmas vacation in New Orleans

2008-07-16T17:46:00.004-04:00

Christmas 2007, Rick and I decided that for the holiday we were going to take a culinary vacation to New Orleans. I had been there many times but Rick had not had the opportunity. We were able to trade my time share for a spot just a few blocks from the French Quarter. Using the web site opentable.com we set up reservations at some of New Orleans’ finest restaurants. We reserved at Bennan’s for brunch, Arnaud’s for dinner, Emeril’s Delmonico and Emeril’s NOLA Restaurant. We also went to the Windsor Court for Christmas brunch. The food was spectacular at all of them and while I don’t personally care for Emeril’s cooking shows, the food and service at his restaurants were actually a cut above. I had been to Brennan’s many years ago and the Bananas Foster was as fabulous as ever. We of course enjoyed Café du Monde and the beignets. We went to the Central Grocery – the site of the original muffuletta, a sandwich on a round sesame loaf with olive salad. We of course enjoyed Harrah’s casino just blocks from our condo and a general tour of the city.

We also took a tour of Oak Alley. This was used in the film "Interview with the Vampire".

While we were enjoying the view from the front of Oak Alley we saw a couple walking down the alley of oak trees. We saw him fall to his knee and propose. She did accept.

It was a wonderful vacation full of history, wonderful food, minor gambling losses, and great memories.

Mother's furniture update

2008-07-16T17:36:00.000-04:00

I was talking to my mother today and guess what. I had mentioned that the sofa in my mother’s living room is the same one that was from my childhood and that my parents never get rid of any furniture. Well after all these years - and seven recoverings - my mother is replacing her sofa. And I was wrong about the barrel backed chair. It is no longer in my mother’s house. In talking with Mom, she mentioned that she didn’t have the barrel back any longer. It turns out that she has a piece of furniture that I used to have in its place. It had totally slipped my mind. I just wanted to correct my statement that my parents never get rid of anything.

Team story update

2008-07-16T09:39:00.001-04:00

I've received a number of amusing comments about the story yesterday concerning the dried plums. It turns out Sunsweet now offers in three flavors - lemon, orange and cherry.

They now also offer them in a single serving pack. What a great idea. If only they had then.

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One more team story

2008-07-15T23:50:00.001-04:00

Occasionally our team would get together for a team meeting. Several people lived in Salt Lake, I lived in Jacksonville, but we would gather in Evansville, Indiana where most of the team lived. As part of the meeting we would often work late to try to resolve as many of our customer issues as we had outstanding. We would jokingly refer to these as ticketfests since our issues were documented in tickets. We would stop at the grocery store, pick up snacks, and jointly resolve as many issues as we could.

One time one of the many snacks that we picked up was lemon essence prunes. If you haven’t tried them, they are delicious. Maddie and I were working on a particularly trying issue when we suddenly realized to our horror that we had managed to snack our way through much of the bag of prunes. This was before they needed to change the name to dried plums.

The look of realization on our faces was likely very comical. Of course, the next day we learned that not only are lemon essence prunes delicious, they are effective. Perhaps we should have been more thoughtful in our consumption of them. So, just as there had been a ketchup pack in that basket from the team, there was also a bag of lemon essence prunes. I ate one. It was as delicious as ever.

Oncologist appointment Wednesday

2008-07-15T20:20:00.001-04:00

I have an appointment with the oncologist Wednesday. He'll be evaluating the effectiveness of the last round of chemotherapy. I'll post an update on Wednesday.
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Another busy day

2008-07-15T20:15:00.002-04:00

It has been another busy day. Getting all the home care scheduled takes some doing. Physical therapy (legs) three times a week, occupational therapy (upper body) three times a week, home health aide three times a week, home health nurse twice a week. All of the individuals I'm working with are very pleasant. I'm being very lucky that way. Again, the true sense of caring is coming through loud and clear. These people treat this as more than a job. It's a calling.
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An apple pie moment

2008-07-15T01:41:00.001-04:00

When we were kids, we always had chores to do. Tina and I were doing the dinner dishes. One washed, one dried. Grandmother had sent over a beautiful apple pie. It was sitting on the kitchen table with a few slices already taken out. Tina and I decided to take a tiny sliver out of the pie. It would never be noticed, we thought. Well, that would have been true if we hadn't done it about 6 or 7 times. Alll these "slivers" added up to a rather large slice. We couldn't figure out at first how Mom figured out that we had eaten a slice of that pie. We learned our lesson.
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Appointment and PT update

2008-07-14T20:32:00.000-04:00

My appointment with the neurologist was uneventful. This was mainly a post-op follow-up. I shouldn't be seeing him again though he is the physician substantiatng my disability.

I did have my first home physical therapy session today. Between that and the 6 wheelchair transfers (bed to chair, chair to car, etc), it was a tiring day.

Appointment update

2008-07-13T22:49:00.002-04:00

I have an appointment the neurologist on Monday. It’s going to be a very early day because the appointment is 9 a.m. Updates will be posted on Monday.

My first plane ride

2008-07-13T22:49:00.001-04:00

While I have flown thousands of flights and more miles than I care to count, my first airplane ride actually goes back to my childhood and it wasn’t with a commercial airline. When we were kids, Dad became very interested in flying small planes. He actually ended up buying a two-seater airplane that would be flown in and out of Westminster airport right next to the college I attended. Some friends of ours near the church also had a private airstrip. Sometimes we would be playing in the back yard and hear a plane. We would look up and there would be Dad.

Sometimes we would go up to Westminster, spend the afternoon, and we would all get airplane rides. Dad would sometimes do loop the loops, and spins. Mom and Dad would use the plane to fly to Oshkosh, Wisconsin for a small plane gathering each summer.

You will recall I mentioned in a previous post that my family never seems to get rid of anything. Part of the airplane is still in my parents’ garage even though it has not been flown for probably at least 30 years.

We were very, very lucky kids to have that kind of opportunity. Most kids don’t have an airplane available to them.

Oops, sorry

2008-07-13T09:14:00.001-04:00

I apologize that there was no blog entry yesterday. Everything is fine but the day just got busy. I did get a few concerned calls and emails as this had been the first day without an update or story. I will attempt daily entries, but please don't be concerned if one day gets missed.
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More blasts from the past

2008-07-11T23:05:00.006-04:00

As I was reviewing photos I came across these other childhood pictures that I thought I would share. The first is of Chris, Steve and me together. The second is at the annual Easter egg hunt at the church. I had just discovered an Easter egg lying in the grass.

The third, though, I think is my favorite. Caught in what could only be called a Fonzie pose, this one was taken in the living room of the house that we grew up in. Note the wallpaper, carpet, drape combination. The house was a row home at 31 Franklintown road just up the street from Grandmother’s house. The barrel backed chair behind me is still in Mom’s current home. The child’s rocker to the right was either Chris’s or Steve’s (there were two of them) and is probably still in my mother’s basement. The box to the right held a vacuum cleaner and is now in my sister Chris’s house and used for storage. My family tends not to get rid of things.

I’m not sure who put together this dapper outfit but it does cut quite a smart statement.

All from a pack of ketchup

2008-07-11T22:53:00.005-04:00

Jim, Maddie and I were working on an implementation in Milwaukee years ago. We were sitting in the cafeteria having dinner, Maddie and I on one side of the table, Jim on the other. Someone was walking toward us with a tray about to exit the cafeteria. In one of those slow motion moments, the gentleman stepped on a single ketchup packet. All of a sudden, Maddie and I were covered in ketchup. The wall to the right was splattered with it. And somehow Jim’s tie ended up with ketchup on it also even though Jim’s back was to the ketchup packet. We sat there in stunned shock, then burst out laughing as we realized what had happened. The gentleman walks by innocently looking at us as if we were crazy and we’re truly astonished at how little ketchup it takes under force to make such a huge mess. We felt like we had been strafed.

In a basket that the team had sent me a few weeks ago there were lots of items reminding me of various trips and foibles that we had been through. There was an envelope that I opened up. It had a ketchup packet in it. I burst out laughing as I recalled this particular story.

Visitors

2008-07-10T20:15:00.000-04:00

Now that I am home, Rick and I certainly welcome visitors. We would request that you contact us first to make sure the day or time you may want to stop by is convenient for all. We appreciate your understanding.

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Home update

2008-07-10T16:56:00.002-04:00

My home physical therapy will start next week and will be three times a week. Home care will come in once or twice a week. Rick and I are getting into a more routine schedule.

Phone calls are welcomed. Since I am now home, I'll be limiting calls on the cell. Please email me for the home phone number.

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Update on Jim

2008-07-09T19:56:00.001-04:00

I did get am update from Jim that his procedure went fine today and he is already home. Rick and I wish him well on his recuperation and are happy he is safely home.
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We're home

2008-07-08T23:54:00.003-04:00

It was a long day. Rick came over early to take as many items home as possible.

Discharge planning with nursing took some time to run through.

By 3 pm we were on our way home. Thanks to Chuck for helping us with the transition.

When I arrived home, the beautiful signs you see at the end of this entry were waiting for me. Thanks to Scott and Leslie for that.

Changing the den to my room worked out very well. It is comfortable and beautiful.

The rest of the day we got settled in. Home care stopped in for an initial visit.

Therapy will likely be here tomorrow.

I know I was apprehensive about today, but it turned out as well as it could. I'm home and about to turn in for a good nights sleep in my own house surrounded by those that love me.

Once again, Rick has done an amazing job. His strength inspires me.

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Moving plan

2008-07-08T00:07:00.001-04:00

Tuesday is the big day. I will be getting a new, lightweight wheelchair. It only weighs 12 pounds instead of the normal 20. This will make it easier for me to move around.

Rick will come over in the morning to start packing up the room. It's amazing what you collect in six weeks.

We'll start the move early afternoon, probably around 2 or so. Any remaining equipment will be delivered after we get home.

Please wish us the best as we move into this new phase of our lives.

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Prayer Request

2008-07-07T10:24:00.001-04:00

My very good friend Jim from Baltimore will be undergoing outpatient surgery Wednesday morning, the 9th. . He will be back home by the afternoon, but will have a three week home recuperation period. Please keep him in your prayers over the next few weeks.

Jim is the creator of my blog. He also has one that can be accessed at www.notbymyself.blogspot.com.

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RAP functions

2008-07-06T21:36:00.004-04:00

When I talk about RAP, I'm not talking about music. I'm talking about our neighborhood historical and preservation organization, Riverside Avondale Preservation.

Riverside (where St. Vincent's is located) and Avondale (where Rick and I live) together form the Riverside-Avondale Historic District.

RAP sponsors a number of events during the year, but the two Rick and I always enjoy the most are the Spring Home Tour and Luminaria in December.

On the Home Tour, there are usually ten homes that may have been recently renovated, perhaps are in the process of being renovated, or simply have some features of note worth seeing. It takes several hours to complete taking the tour. It's always fascinating to see what other people have done to their homes. Sometimes it's like seeing something amazing from Candace Olsen of HGTV's "Divine Design". Other times you think you've walked into a bad episode of "Trading Spaces". In any case, it's always interesting.

Luminaria takes place on a Sunday night before Christmas. At dusk, white paper bags are filled with sand and a lit candle and then line the curbs of the entire historic district. Tradition says the lights guide the spirit of the Christ Child to your home.

Our house is on a corner and it takes thirty-six candles to cover the property. Forty thousand luminaria light the entire historic district. People host parties in their yards, people from all over Jacksonville come to enjoy the sights. The business district is one block away and very busy. It's in the quiet beauty of the side streets with the unbroken lines of softly glowing lights that I get the most pleasure.

Chuck and Ron always host a Luminaria Open House that night. Walking home from it late at night is always a special treat. The streets are quiet, the crowds are gone, the candles are still glowing and the world seems at peace.

Ramp pictures

2008-07-05T22:03:00.002-04:00

You may recall when I put the entry out the home visit, I made note of how beautiful the ramp was.

Here are two pictures of it. Thanks again Alan and Chris for such a great job.

Thanks also to Scott Albury for stopping by to take these. I've known and worked with Scott and the staff at St. Vincent's in Jacksonville for 28 years or so.

Good Friends and Neighbors

2008-07-05T20:10:00.001-04:00

Our good friends Chuck and Ron have been so helpful to us. They live down the street and helped Rick get the house ready today. The day I went to my appointment with my surgeon when this all started, they had secured a wheelchair for us to use with very little notice. They have been regular visitors at Heartlands, have hosted Rick on several occasions for meals and have been a big help to us in many ways. We have been blessed with all of our wonderful friends, but neighbors that are also friends are a little different and very special.

Chuck walks their dogs frequently and has been keeping the neighbors updated on my progress. When he mentioned all the people that had been inquiring about me, I was surprised. It will be good to be able to greet them as Rick and I sit on the porch or as I attempt to pull weeds with a "grabber" from my wheelchair from the sidewalk. I won't be able to do most of the gardening I used to, but I'll do what I can.

Chuck and Ron are gracious hosts and excellent cooks and have a home perfect for entertaining. Rick is there as I type this enjoying dinner with them tonight. While I love to cook, I never seem to be able to carry off a dinner party with the ease they seem to come by naturally.

We still laugh (thank God) about an incident that took place at a dinner they hosted a number of years ago. The table was elegantly set with beautiful china and Waterford. Somehow, as I set down my wine glass, it wobbled and started to fall. We've all had those slow motion moments where we couldn't stop a thing. The wine glass fell on it's side and didn't break. The bread plate did instead. After a moment of stunned silence, they both burst out laughing. "It's only a plate. We've got more". What classy guys.

Of course, it was family china, a German manufacturer called Hutschenreuther where even www.replacements.com doesn't have a match to their pattern and they have over 286,000 china patterns on file. Check them out if you need a few any pieces to fill out your china, silver or crystal.

Chuck and Ron, Rick and I thank you for your continued friendship and support.

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Going Home

2008-07-04T18:31:00.000-04:00

I will be discharged from Heartlands rehab facility on Tuesday, July 8th to return home. Home care and home rehab are in the process of being arranged.

Our neighbor, Molly, has cared for a number of family members and has a wheelchair and hospital bed. She has generously offered them to us for our use. Thank you Molly. Saturday, the bed will be put in the den where Rick and I believe I will be the most comfortable and where Rick can care for me best. Some furniture will need to be re-arranged, but I will have a view out the front of the house from the bed and there will be room for visitors. I'll be able to transfer to the wheelchair easily from the bed.

We're both very happy that I am coming home, but also realize that new challenges and learning opportunities will be a large part of the next few weeks. We are prepared to face them head on, working together as a team.

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Hydrangea

2008-07-04T13:40:00.000-04:00

The hydrangea at the corner of the house blooms more fully some years than others. The picture that follows was definitely from one of the better years. I was also "liming" it heavily that year as it had started changing to pink and we prefer blue. There are a variety of shades of blue and pink in the picture. It bloomed this fully all summer. I hope you enjoy the picture as much as we enjoy the hydrangea.

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Recollections of the fourth of July

2008-07-03T22:27:00.012-04:00

The Fourth of July in Catonsville, the town where I grew up, was always a big deal. There would be activities at the Senior High School (in the days when we called them that). The parade was always at 3pm. Other towns would stagger their parade start times so some of the participants would be able to attend more than one parade.

Each year local politicians, particularly the State Comptroller of the Treasury, Louis Goldstein, was there to "press the flesh" as much as possible. Mr. Goldstein was well respected and held that elected post from 1959 - 1998 when he died at the age of 85. His career with the State of Maryland spanned sixty years. I remember Senator Paul Sarbanes, until recently a US Senator from Maryland, attending that parade every year and the same with current Senator Barbara Mikulski. They just didn't miss it.

Local bands would strut their stuff, the Jazzercise women in pink outfits and spotless white tennis shoes would dance their way down the street. The Scouts would always join in the fun – the parade, not the dancing.

For years after the Colts left Baltimore, the Colts Band still performed and would participate. We also started having a huge band from Canada attend many years. There were several hundred members and they always sounded great. They were likely combining this with a trip to Washington, DC each year.

The Boumi Temple motorcycle group would ride their Harleys and the clown group always entertained the crowd.

The fire department and police department would always have their contingents and pump up the sirens. We would scream for more.

There would be floats by the local civic groups and some of the church groups that would loosely tie to the theme of the celebration that year. Quite often, the themes seemed to be as generic as the floats.

Kids on decorated bikes were always part of the parade, a contest having been held earlier in the day.

The various veterans groups would march and the crowd would cheer and honor their service appropriately. One of the men from my church was part of the color guard for his veterans group. You could see the pride in Herman's face to be marching in the parade.

Of course, there had to be the convertibles with tops down and people sitting in the back or on the back seat. This is when these were HUGE cars. They seemed to go for blocks. They probably were for the parade Grand Marshal and the Catonsville Celebrations Committee. The Grand Marshall always seemed to be someone I had never heard of.

In a current side note, the Towson (county seat of Baltimore County) parade has as its Grand Marshals this year Chef Duff and the entire Charm City Cakes staff. For you Food Network junkies (like me), this is the group from Ace of Cakes. Towson takes there parade pretty seriously also.

The end of the parade was always the "commercial" group. Usually, it was only "Carter's Upholstery". They drove their white van with their ad on the side, but sitting on top the van was "the chair". It was pretty awful. It was a kitchen chair that was upholstered in red, white and blue. There was a ruffle on the bottom of the seat. As the years went on, the van and chair still were the last entry in the parade.

And then it happened. The van was there, but no chair. Everyone was yelling. "Where's the chair". It was back the next year.

During the parade, volunteers would be passing buckets to collect money for the fireworks. As a child, we thought that meant the fireworks might not happen that night if they didn't collect enough.

The fireworks were always described as a "Mammoth Fireworks Display". To avoid the huge crowds at the High School, our family would go to the church grounds down the street. We could see the aerial display and avoid all the traffic and crowds. We were allowed to stand very still and enjoy sparklers. They always looked like miniature fireworks to us.

Those are my recollections of the 4th as a child. As the years have progressed, I don't know if the parade has changed all that much. I can tell you it is more popular than ever. So much so, that people now start saving viewing positions days in advance. They will place chairs on the side of the street as early as the beginning of the week. They will also lay out tarps on the high school grounds to claim space for the finale of the big day.

This parade also takes place down Frederick Road, the main street of the town. I'm surprised this doesn't cause more issues. Jim took a few pictures and they appear here. The sign that Jim has shown must be a singularly unique sign. Doesn’t it make you want to set up a chair in the middle of the road to watch the parade?

The parade also passes directly in front of the library where judging takes place. In a spectacular case of poor planning, a pedestrian island was built in the middle of the street this past year. Hmmmm...how will the floats get past or over this?

During my last few years living in Baltimore, I lived on the grounds of the church. My good friends, the Heasleys also lived on the property in the Parsonage. The youth group would create floats for the parade. Crepe paper in July heat in Baltimore does not hold up well.

One year we had a crab feast at the Carriage House where. I lived. The Heasleys had never really picked crabs before, but they took to it pretty well. Get a bushel of steamed crabs, cover the table with brown paper and go to it. Nothing tastes sweeter than crabs steamed in Old Bay seasoning. We'd walk down to the High School, enjoy the fireworks and walk back home.

On a few occasions, we went to the Mall in DC to enjoy the fireworks and National Symphony in person. Hot sticky, horrible Metro crowds to deal with to get home, but well worth it.

I'd also enjoyed the fireworks at the Inner Harbor in downtown Baltimore. After I moved to Jacksonville, Rick and I would usually just enjoy "A Capitol Fourth" on PBS and the Macy's presentation. Turn on the surround sound and you feel like you are there. On at least one occasion, we were in Washington, D.C. on the 4th. We had access to the rooftop of an office building and were able to enjoy them from there.

Once we were in Old Lyme over the 4th for an Overton/Camp family reunion of sorts. We were able to view fireworks from several towns throughout the evening across the Connecticut River but they were far enough away we could not hear them. One of these towns was Old Saybrook, the home of one of my favorite actresses, Katherine Hepburn. On at least three occasions, we were in New York City on the 4th. Once, our hotel room at the Marriott Marquis in Time Square had a direct view to the Statue of Liberty. We were able to watch the fireworks from the comfort of our room.

Another time, we went with Roger and Jennifer Overton (Rick's brother and sister-in-law) over to Brooklyn Heights to watch the Macy's fireworks over the East River reflected in the New York skyline. It was boiling hot, but the view was amazing.

The last time, we had just returned from a trip to Connecticut and were about to check into a Marriott on West 54th. I dropped Rick off with the luggage, dropped the car off across the street at Avis, walked back to where Rick was waiting. I had only been gone five minutes. Rick said "guess who was in the car behind you?" Of course, I had no clue who it would have been. It turns out Dolly Parton and her band had perfomed that evening at the fireworks, had completed the show, and were staying in our hotel.

I know this has been an unusually long entry. I just love the 4th and have celebrated it in so many different ways.

A safe and happy 4th to all of you.

The birthday cruise

2008-07-02T22:04:00.009-04:00

In March 2007 Wendy, Rick’s sister, was going to be celebrating her 60th birthday. Rick and I decided to take Wendy on a cruise for a surprise birthday present. We once again used Royal Caribbean, this time the Enchantment of the Seas departing from Ft. Lauderdale. The itinerary was: Fort Lauderdale, Florida; Key West, Florida; Cozumel, Mexico; Belize City, Belize; Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

We were able to secure adjoining cabins on the rear of the ship with enormous balconies.

What we hadn’t taken into consideration that it was spring break. Luckily the spring breakers didn’t get in our way too much. Their idea of a good time and our idea of a good time never seemed to cross paths. In fact at one point during the cruise I was lying in a chaise lounge in the shade, Wendy was about 15 feet away, and neither of us realized for several hours that were in that close of proximity to each other.

At our first stop, Key West, Rick and I did parasailing.

Rick and I had not been in Key West for some time and did not have much time to walk around but we were able to see some familiar spots from previous trips we had taken there.

The evening we decided to celebrate Wendy’s birthday we went to one of the ships specialty restaurants, Chops. The meal was magnificent. Here are two pictures of that memorable evening.

In Cozumel we wandered the stores, purchased a few rugs for the house, and enjoyed local cuisine.

For dinners we ended up being seated with a family of five whose company we came to enjoy. The family was a mother, a father, and their three adult children. You never know who will end up at your table and this turned out to be a pleasant surprise. We looked forward to dinner conversation with them each evening. Once again I did not gain an ounce on this cruise.

In Belize we opted to take the airboat tour. It turned out that our dining companions were on the same tour. The tour took us through marshy areas. We saw a lot of local flora and fauna. The air boat held about twenty. The picture below is in the embarkation cabana.

We all returned from the cruise refreshed and relaxed. It was a perfect celebration for a very special birthday.

There's no place like home

2008-07-02T19:49:00.002-04:00

The home assessment visit took place today. Rick brought the wheelchair I will be using at home and with the assistance of the therapists got me into our car. That first transfer was a little rough, but things would get smoother as the visit progressed.

I had not been out of the facility since my last radiation treatment in late May or early June. The ride to our home was comfortable.

Once at the house, we have to back into the neighbors driveway for access to the sidewalk. This time, Rick and I performed the transfer out of the car ourselves and did it flawlessly. It was teamwork at it's best. I was so proud of Rick at that moment I was nearly overcome with emotion. What did finally make me break down was the realization that I was home. As Rick parked the car and opened the house, I needed to wheel the chair from the neighbors driveway, across the front of the house, make the turn and go down the side of the house to the entrance to the back yard (we have a corner lot). This gave me a chance to look at the entire garden and explain to the therapists what everything was. Rick has done a great job of keeping the gardens up and they looked beautiful.

We reached the garden gate. One of the therapists opened it. I felt as if I was Dorothy in "The Wizard of Oz" when she opens the door of the Kansas house in the sepia tinted section and it changes to the Land of the Munchkins. The ramp looked like the Yellow Brick Road.

Alan and Chris - the ramp is a work of art. Even the therapists were impressed. It rises out of the bed of Pentas (red flowers, blooms constantly, attracts butterflies) on the left, next to our dogwood, stops at a turning platform overlooking the fountain in the corner and the central bed under the huge live oak. This bed contains Ruellia (Mexican petunia, a constant bloomer in purple), Birds of Paradise, African Iris, Shrimp Plants, several varieties of Croton and a few others. The second part of the ramp takes me past the raised bed of impatiens that are a riot of colors - magenta with splashes of red-orange. The ground level of that bed is geraniums, New Guinea impatiens and some double impatiens. These are all in pinks, purples, salmons and oranges.

Once on the deck, I'm able to have access to the entire deck. Rick let Margo and Simon out and they ran over to greet me I stopped moving in the chair and just drank it all in. I was in Paradise.

It was time to get down to business. We went in the house. I was able to move everywhere easily except the laundry room (schucks) and parts of the kitchen. We will need to rearrange some furniture, but other than that, they deemed the house safe and appropriate for my return.

I was also able to access the front porch. Rick and I love to sit on what we call the "viewmaster" porch. We have outdoor fans in the ceiling and in cool weather we can sit out there and enjoy watching neighbors walking their dogs.

The exit from the house and down the ramp was flawless. Rick and I again did the transfer back into the car unassisted for the trip back to Heartlands. The same with the exit from the car to go back into the building.

It was a most emotional and exciting day. Rick and I functioned perfectly as a team. We know we have a lot ahead of us and that there will be challenges with my care. We will meet them head on. We are ready.

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Ring Ring

2008-07-01T23:51:00.001-04:00

When Jim, Maddie and I were working at Providence Hospital in Mobile, Alabama we often worked late. Our temporary work areas were in a large office that housed some of the hospital information systems staff, Ann, Joe and Sharon.

During the evening, one of us managed to knock the phone off Joe's desk. It was a standard tan desk phone. It exploded when it hit the floor. At first, there was dead silence from the three of us. Then we lost it. We laughed so hard we cried.

We used almost an entire roll of clear tape to put the pieces of the phone together. When we checked the phone, it still worked. We taped down the switch hook, put the phone back on Joe's desk and left for the night.
We wanted to be sure we got to the office early the next morning. We acted as if nothing had happened the night before. Joe arrived at his desk and noticed the phone. He asked what happened to the phone as we called his extension. The phone rang, Joe picked up the handset and said "hello". Since we had taped down the switch hook, the phone continued to ring. Joe said "hello" louder and louder.

By this time, the entire office was laughing out loud. We apologized to Joe for breaking the phone and for the practical joke. He took it all in stride.

Traveling with Jim and Maddie was never boring.

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Physical therapy/home assessment

2008-07-01T20:02:00.001-04:00

Today in therapy, we did a lot of work on legs and upper body. By the time we went to the parallel bars, I had already done about an hour of foot biking, worked with arm weights and legs lifts with a two pound weight attached to the left ankle. My right leg continues to lag the left, so we also concentrated on exercises in the right leg to work specific muscles.

When we moved to the parallel bars, I was almost too exhausted to stand. it did take three tries for me to stand out of the chair. I was finally able to stand and to take six steps. They were well executed with more control than I had exhibited before. Manny was pleased and so was I. They were positive steps.

The home assessment is scheduled for tomorrow afternoon at 1:30. Rick will pick me up in our car, four of the therapists (Manny, Deb, Rachel and Stephanie) will determine if the house is ready to meet my needs.

I have not been home since May 22. It will be wonderful to be there again, even if for a short time. .

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Meet the family

2008-06-30T21:32:00.004-04:00

Since I have mentioned many of my family it’s probably time to show you a picture of us all. This is a picture of Mom and Dad’s wedding day. The wedding was performed at our church, St. John’s United Church of Christ in Catonsville. We’re standing in the portico of Overhills Mansion. The picture was taken from inside the main entrance of this 1897 grand home.

After our congregation decided to move to Baltimore County from Baltimore City they purchased this 33 acre estate and used the mansion to serve as a church until we built the new church building. But more on all of that in anther story.

I remember thinking, I have never seen my mother more beautiful in this blue dress, or dad more handsome. All of us are dressed in our best clothes as we start off our lives together.

Back row: Steve, Dad, Mom, Charlotte, Chris
Front row: Barry, Chuck, Tina, Terry

Steve is the oldest and currently lives in Manchester, Maryland with his wife Debbie. Steve is the one who rode down on his motorcycle several weeks ago to visit. Dad is retired from both the Baltimore County Police Department and the Amtrak Police Department, having served 20 years with each organization. Mom did a heck of a job of raising such a large family. Mom and Dad are still living in the house that we grew up in. Charlotte is third oldest and lives in Atlanta with her husband Andrew and her family. She does mission work and is currently in Liberia. She has traveled between the United States and Liberia for a number of years. My sister Chris lives in Catonsville, the same town as my parents, and has just completed 38 years with the federal government. She has purchased a motor home and has chosen to take a well deserved retirement. She and mom drove down in the motor home several weeks ago for a visit.

In the next row is me. I am the middle child, currently living in Jacksonville with Rick, my partner of seventeen years. Next to me is Chuck the next to the youngest. Chuck is currently living in Florida. My sister Tina is six months younger than me so that puts her fifth in age. (Keep in mind, we're a combined family.) Tina currently lives in Westminster Maryland not far from McDaniel College, my alma mater. Tina was down recently for a visit. My youngest brother Terry works for the State of Maryland and resides with Mom and Dad.

Thanks to Chris for sending me this photo last year. It is a treasured keepsake.

Family drive to Southern Maryland

2008-06-30T21:29:00.002-04:00

I believe I have mentioned before that I grew up in a large family that was the result of a second marriage for my mother and a second marriage for my step father.

Dad’s father, Pap Pap Schuhart, was originally from Southern Maryland – the Chaptico area. That is about two hours south of Baltimore. A couple times a year we would drive down for the day to visit relatives that still lived in the area. We would all pile into the station wagon – all nine of us – playing games along the way – the alphabet game, the license plate game, I-see-something. Now of course, kids can’t get in a car without a DVD, an iPod, or a cell phone.

Along the way we would watch for familiar sights. One in particular was the Wigwam Bakery. This bakery had a glass teepee out front lined with neon tubes. We never stopped but we always watched for it along the way. And of course, there were all the old motor lodge motels slowly falling into disrepair over the years – some advertising air conditioning, some advertising TV. They always had interesting names and we would watch for them each time. I think there was a Martha Washington hotel and of course others just named after local cities.

Aunt Lena lived in an old farmhouse and was a cousin of Pap Pap’s. Cousin Lottie was her daughter and lived in a newer home built on the farm. Cousin Lottie still lives there. The farm is no longer active and she will be celebrating her 91st birthday this year. When the farm was active they grew tobacco, corn, and beans. It also had a chicken house. It was the chickens that fascinated us. We couldn’t wait to get there, get some of the feed corn for the chickens, rub those kernels off and throw them through the fence to those birds. Of course, after a while our hands were completely blistered. We never learned and did it every time.

Growing up in Baltimore city and then Baltimore county, this much land was a luxury. We would run around all day long, walking through the fields, swinging on the swing, playing tag and just enjoying all this fresh air.

Aunt Lena would cook huge country meals. Of course chicken was likely to be featured at each of them. And at the end of the day we would drive home exhausted but invigorated from a day in the country.

Wheelchair Ramp update

2008-06-30T13:04:00.001-04:00

The wheelchair ramp has been built and installed. Given the way our house is sited, it was determined putting the ramp in the back garden would work best. A twenty-eight inch rise to the deck across the back of the house required a twenty-eight foot ramp of two fourteen foot sections with a landing and turn halfway up. The ramp will take me to the deck and allow me to wheel over to the double doors into the house.

Alan Curran, who has done a number of maintenance and repair jobs around our home, painting rooms, painting and repairing porches and decks, built the ramp. Alan donated his labor in building the ramp. We are both extremely grateful for his generosity. We're also grateful it was completed by the promised date even though we had rain most of last week.

In the "small world" area, Chris, the carpenter assisting Alan ended up giving up fishing on Sunday to assist with the ramp. He mentioned this to his girlfriend. Out of the blue, she asks "is this for Rick and Barry?". It turns out Chris' girlfriend is our dry cleaner over by Rick's former office. We were likely their best customers.

Now that the ramp is complete, the home assessment can be scheduled. Rick will pick me up in our car with the wheelchair I'll be using when I get home. Staff from the rehab facility will accompany to assess the appropriateness of the house for my return. The home visit should take place this week.

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Outer Banks

2008-06-29T18:54:00.008-04:00

For three years in the early 80s three groups of friends and I went to the Outer Banks in North Carolina to an area called Duck. Each year we rented a different home on the ocean and we had anywhere from six to ten people.

The first year we rented the cottage from Phil Tigan who was Assistant Director at ISD. We went Labor Day weekend which started the tradition. We were two houses back from the oceanfront but still with beautiful views of the ocean. We toured the area going to Kill Devil Hills. We enjoyed the local grocery store, the Mucky Duck, and enjoyed the company of good friends. We spent some time during the week exploring lighthouses. We knew there was one more lighthouse at Ocracoke Island. We got up very early one morning to take the three hour one way drive. When there, we discovered a breakfast place with the best damn coffee in the world. It became an annual pilgrimage to go back for that coffee.

One of the idiosyncrasies of this house was a sliding screen door out onto one of the decks that was difficult to tell if it was open or closed – at least for me. I must have walked into that door five times. Luckily it didn’t get bent too badly. We finally had to put a marker on the door so I could tell if it was open or closed.

That first year two members of our party were not able to stay the whole week because college classes were starting. They were going to leave late at night and unfortunately had spent the entire week not getting gas. So late in the evening we’re siphoning gas from one of our cars to the other so they’d at least have the opportunity to get to a gas station. Jim offered Brian some milk to coat his stomach in case he accidentally swallowed some gas. Brian, not understanding the intention said, “No thanks, I’m not thirsty.” We used the house hose which we had to cut and they were successfully on their way.

The second year we had a different group and a different home. A picture of the group is included here.

Back row: Jim, Mark who I have known since second grade, Judy, Barry – no comments on hair and glasses please
Front row: Dave and Joan who now have a family in Ellicott city and just returned from the Outer Banks this evening from their annual multigenerational family vacation, Nancy a friend of Mark’s, Kathy, and John.

One evening we were all in particularly good spirits and perhaps ended up making a little more noise than was appropriate. More on that later. We also discovered by accident why the tarheels are called the tarheels. It took us some time to get the tar out of the bathtub that accidentally got tracked in.

We would usually do group dinners with everyone sharing in the cooking and cleanup responsibilities. This particular year, one of our group had brought a frozen turkey. Unfortunately the evening we were to have the turkey the thawing of same bird had not yet begun. We gamely moved forward with the dinner slicing off cooked pieces of the turkey as we could and continued cooking that bird throughout the evening. We had a lot of cheese and crackers, stuffing with too much onion in it, and luckily no one ended up with salmonella poisoning.

The third year we had a smaller group and were closer to the ocean. You remember from the year two I mentioned that there would be more about the evening that we partied a little louder than we should have. When we arrived at check in, the real estate agent said, “Well, Mr. Whiteley, we had some complaints from your neighbors last year about the noise. Please be more careful this year.” We were mortified. They hadn’t said anything on our way out the previous year but waited a whole year to mention it to us at check-in.

I remember this particular house had a guest book, a bottle of wine, and a note from the owner Millie. We had friends who were going to be arriving late so we looked at the phone, and gave them the number on it in case they had problems finding the house. Our guests did arrive late and said that they had had difficulty finding the place. We indicated that we had been home all evening waiting for a call and they said, “Well, the number you gave us isn’t the right number.” We checked and the number they had was the one on the phone. We called the number ourselves and got an entirely different person. So in our note in the guest book saying that had enjoyed the vacation we included a section saying, “Millie, Millie, Millie, why is the number on the phone not the number of the phone?” We never did find out what the number was.

It was an election year and we were having a discussion around politics. We were trying to recall who George McGovern’s running mate had been in a presidential election and it was quite late at night. It was of course befoe the Internet and none of us could recall the information. We finally realized that even that late at night the public libraries in Hawaii would be open. So, we called the public library in Hawaii to ask and got the answer to our question. It was Sargent Shriver. Since all of us in attendance were Marylanders we were quite embarrassed that we didn’t recall that his running mate was in fact from Maryland.

Several of those that went on these various trips have continued vacationing in the Outer Banks to this day. So we started a fine tradition of memories with wonderful friends.

Most of our time would center around playing games, taking long wonderful naps, walking on the beach at night, and enjoying the amazing phosphorescence that would literally set the beach and the ocean aglow. Since there were so few houses in the area, it was almost as if you had a private beach. We would do sing-alongs, “You Are My Sunshine” being a particular favorite. None of us are good singers but it always sounded very good to us. We stopped taking flashlights on the beach walks for two reasons - to see the phosphorescence and with the flashlights we could see all the crabs on the beach. Somehow it was better not knowing that you were about to have your toe nibbled by a crab. This was of course before the area got built up and the stars at night would be magnificent. We could see the Milky Way and felt like we could see the world.

Second round of chemotherapy complete

2008-06-28T20:33:00.002-04:00

Friday night I completed my second round of chemotherapy. Once again, I was fortunate that there were no adverse side effects. I'll see the oncologist on July 16th to see if it has had the desired result.
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Hooked on cruises

2008-06-28T17:23:00.007-04:00

In 2006, our friends Jim and Craig suggested that we all take a cruise. The final group ended up being Jim and Craig, our friends Steve and Ben previously mentioned in the blog, Kristie, a friend of Jim and Craig’s from New Orleans, and Patricia, a friend from Jacksonville. A nice sized group – not too large and not too small. Now Rick had been on a cruise before but I had not. We weren’t sure that this was the type of vacation that we might enjoy, but given the group of people that we would be sailing with we knew it would be fun. We started planning months in advance and I kept a detailed notebook of all the plans. Of course, all my other friends were making fun of me for this but quite often would check with me for details.

We decided to sail on Royal Caribbean’s Mariner of the Seas departing from Port Canaveral – about 2 ½- 3 hours from Jacksonville. The itinerary was their western Caribbean offering - Port Canaveral, Florida; Labadee, Haiti; Ocho Rios, Jamaica; George Town, Grand Cayman; Cozumel, Mexico; Port Canaveral, Florida.

All of us selected different activities that we wanted to participate in. Now this may come as a surprise to many people. But Rick and I love parasailing. So in Labadee, Royal Caribbean’s private island, Rick and I did the parasail. In Ocho Rios we just wandered around the shopping area. We did a Nautilus submarine excursion in Grand Cayman.

In Cozumel we decided to go to the Mayan ruins at Tulum which border the Caribbean. Steve and Ben accompanied us on this particular excursion. Inside the city proper it was extremely hot but once you went to the edge that borders the Caribbean the view was spectacular and a cool breeze would blow over you.

Barry, Rick, Ben, Steve

Since this was the first cruise Rick and I had taken together we weren’t quite sure what to expect. We loved every minute of it. Our balcony cabin was perfectly situated. The Mariner of the Seas is a magnificent ship. The food was amazing. Incredibly enough, even though the average is to gain one pound per day I didn’t gain an ounce. I made sure that every day I walked the ship vigorously exploring all the different areas.

Of course the volume of activities they offer is infinite. One of the highlights of this particular cruise is a game similar to the Newlywed Game where they have three couples – a newlywed couple, a couple married about 25 years, and a couple married 50 years. You could not make up the answers that these people gave to the questions. It’s amazing how expensive Bingo can become on a cruise ship and how quickly those games move. You’re playing multiple cards at a time and you’re playing for high stakes money which adds to the pressure. And of course you’re always just one square away when someone else yells “bingo!” I don’t know how the women in those bingo parlors do it.

We all gathered for meals. Everyone did their own thing the rest of the time. Rick in particular enjoys an afternoon nap so on day two Ben started to ask if I had thrown Rick overboard because Rick hadn’t been seen in the afternoons yet. Walking the decks late at night was particularly beautiful – looking at the stars, feeling the ocean breeze just blowing over you. We often got into very spirited games of Uno with rules that never seemed to be printed on the box. I don’t recall winning but one game and that must have been a fluke.

Seven days passed much too quickly. Following is a photo of the happy cruisers. Seldom have I seen a group shot where everyone looks their best. It was a wonderful vacation that enabled us to share a lot of quality time with some very good friends. And while we have taken subsequent cruises, you never forget your first time.

Steve, Jim, Ben
Rick, Patricia Barry
Craig, Kristie

TGIF

2008-06-27T21:15:00.001-04:00

It should be a restful weekend. Therapy today was a repeat of yesterday. At the end of the session, Manny, one of my therapists played the guitar and sang songs. Manny is Filipino, relatively short (I tower over him at 5 10 1/2") and a decided Elvis fan. That did add a new dimension to "You ain't nothing but a hound dog" for me but he did a great job and everyone appreciated his performance.

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A great photo of Rick

2008-06-27T15:32:00.006-04:00

A letter and photo arrived the other day from Peter Camp, Rick and Wendy’s cousin. The Camps, Aunt Polly and Uncle Nelson, lived in Connecticut where Aunt Polly still resides. Before the family started vacationing in Old Lyme they would go to Cape Cod and rent a cottage for the week on the bay side of the Cape. Ted, Rick and Wendy’s dad, was an avid sailor and had a wooden sailboat that they would use on the water. Uncle Nelson always had a camera around his neck and in this particular camera he used Kodachrome color slide film.

Apparently this particular type of slide film fades very little with time so the picture you are seeing here is of Rick at Cape Cod when he was probably seven or eight years old. I took this picture of the photo with my phone camera. The colors are so brilliant in the original photo Peter sent that I didn’t recognize at first that this wasn’t a professional, current photograph. So thank you, Peter, for sharing this priceless memory. Rick and I will treasure this photo.

A cavalcade of ID badges

2008-06-26T21:53:00.017-04:00

Over the years working in the Ascension Health facilities, many hospitals would issue us ID badges. Since we often would have return visits it was easier to hold onto them and not get a new one every time. Over the course of 29 years I had quite a collection. I decided to put them on the bulletin board in my office in St. Louis. Most of them are standard ID badges, some from hospitals that are no longer part of Ascension Health.

(Click the photo for a larger image,)

Many have photos that are absolutely horrible images of me. A couple bear mentioning. There are two badges from St. Mary’s Milwaukee because on the first badge the word Information was spelled wrong. On one of my badges from St. Thomas in Nashville – a blue engraved one – they wanted our titles. At the time my title was principal consultant and I told them, “principal with a P A L” to be sure it was spelled properly. Lo and behold the next day my badge arrived and is says Barry Whiteley, PAL, Hospital Information Systems. They did redo it but I still have that one. One of the badges was an access badge to the Advanced Development Center for CGE&Y in Chicago. This is where the OmniBuyer implementations were developed. It is quite possibly the worst photo ever taken. All of us look like munchkins on our photo badges.

On my last ISD badge, the photo was a reasonable likeness but the coloring was off and I always looked like I had a bad case of jaundice.

My current Ascension Health badge actually has the best ID photo ever taken of me. Thank you, Alicia.

A number of my Daughters of Charity service pins are also on the board. These pins were issued every five years.

My original ID did not have a photo on it. But if it had, it would have been the following picture because sometimes that’s how long I feel I have been with the organization.

Cafeteria food

2008-06-26T18:40:00.001-04:00

When you traveled as much as I did for work, you ate a lot of hospital cafeteria food. It was always interesting to me to see what each had to offer and sometimes the food was quite good. When I first started traveling to St. Vincent's Jacksonville, the food was amazing. I remember ordering blueberry pancakes one morning and was asked how many I wanted. Thinking they would be the size you make at home, I said three. Turns out the pancakes were huge. I left it at one.

Providence Hospital in Mobile, Al makes a mean fried chicken. It's as good as any you would get anywhere else

One time at Good Samaritan in Pottsville there was a item I had not seen before. When I was told it was a dumpling filled with potato filling in butter and onions I thought, well, that sounds interesting. I was about to have my first pierogie. It was not my last.

Seton Medical Center, Austin, Tx, introduced me to the best breakfast burritos I'd ever had. Someone would set up a cart outside the office building where Purchasing was located. If they were gone when I arrived in the morning it would be a disappointing day.

St. Vincent's in Birmingham celebrated National Pickle week one time with a pickle bar. I love pickles and was very surprised to find watermelon pickles included in the selection.

I was at Providence Hospital, Washington, D.C. and was pleased to find they actually had scrapple for breakfast and well as old fashioned pork sausage. They also make a heck of a cheese steak.

I know that my very favorite hospital cafeteria food was from Columbia-St. Mary's in Milwaukee. I'm ashamed to admit I would even check before a trip there to find out if it was the right food cycle week to be able to have "Tater Tot Casserole". A basic ground beef, cheese, tater tots, onion, cream of mushroom soup mixture topped with more tater tots crisped on top. Yum. I miss it already.

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Physical therapy

2008-06-26T16:46:00.001-04:00

In therapy today mostly repeats of previous activities. I did move to 4 pound weights for the upper body exercises. I had been using 3 pounds prior to this. Two pound weights are being attached to my left leg for leg lifts. The right leg continues to lag. I am not able to lift it without assistance.

Some medicine ball throwing and catching and some spirited balloon badminton for reaction and stretch rounded out the day.
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An Ormond Beach Icon

2008-06-25T23:25:00.001-04:00

For the most part, Rick and Wendy grew up in Ormond Beach just above Daytona Beach. For Rick's 45th birthday, Rick, Nonnie (Rick and Wendy's Mom) and I decided to go to Julian's Restaurant for dinner. www.juliansrest.com. When you walk into the restaurant, you feel like you have walked into the 60's. The overall feel of the place is Polynesian. There is a lounge singer at an organ and you would almost think it was Sherri North. It would not be a stretch to see Don Ho stroll by.

The menu is pure 60's also. Shrimp cocktail, stuffed mushrooms, prime rib and Chicken Supreme.

The web site indicates the restaurant has been open for 35 years with the same manager.

Mai Tais with an umbrella are likely ordered regularly. It was an interesting step back in time.

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Monkey update

2008-06-25T22:13:00.001-04:00

Well, the Hess Shoe story generated a bit of discussion with my family. Some of them thought it was a shoe store, like me. Others remember it as a barber shop. Well, it turns out it was both. Hmmm...shoes and a cut anyone?
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PT update

2008-06-25T21:38:00.001-04:00

Today in addition to previous exercises, I was able to take four small steps We had not attempted any walking in a while, so this was encouraging. My transfers from bed to chair and back via a "sliding board" are becoming second nature. When using a sliding board, one end of a board is placed under your leg, the other end is placed on the target surface and you slide from one surface to the other. You then remove the board. Think of a temporary bridge from one place to another.
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Chemotherapy / Physical Therapy Update

2008-06-24T22:20:00.000-04:00

Once again, no negative reaction to chemotherapy. I slept well last night and felt strong in physical therapy.

In physical therapy today I continued standing practice and was able to stand for 3 minutes 45 seconds today. I did twenty minutes on the mechanical bike for arms and my regular weight routine. I did manual foot bicycling today – this is the same piece of equipment that is used for arm biking – a set of pedals and a stand – but this is the first time that I had done any leg or foot biking that was not mechanically assisted. I was able to apply forward and backward rotational pressure with both legs equally. It was not only the left leg driving. The right leg was also participating. So while the right leg continues to lag, there is function there.

The last new exercise was to remove my legs from the wheelchair foot rests and to move myself across the floor in the chair with my legs. I was able to do this easily in reverse with both legs on tile. This of course would involve placing the foot on the floor and pushing backwards. Moving forward I’m currently only able to do with the left leg. Digging the heel on the floor, pulling forward, stopping and repeating so as not to let momentum move me but make my legs move me. I currently cannot move forward with my right leg.

My blood pressure continues to be perfect every time it is taken. My sugar is well controlled and blood work continues to be normal.

On the streets where I used to live

2008-06-24T22:17:00.009-04:00

While I really have never changed careers, I used to satisfy any wanderlust need I may have had by moving on a semi-regular basis – at least in Baltimore. From 1979 to 1991 I lived in five different places.

Blogmaster Nancy was one of my roommates in my first and second apartments. My first apartment was in Catonsville actually around the corner from my parents’ house in an older development with no air conditioning. The original rent in 1979 was $205 per month including heat. My second apartment with Nancy was in Anne Arundel County. It was in a much more modern complex with air conditioning, swimming pool and a slightly higher price tag.

The third was my first venture into Ellicott City but not in the historic district.

The fourth apartment is one of the most interesting places that I have ever lived. Blogmaster Jim was my roommate. We lived on the second and third floor of a storefront building on Main Street in historic Ellicott City. At one point this building had been a hotel and each of the three floors had a ground level exit because it was built into the side of a steep hill.

Moving day was quite interesting. Many historic districts offer permit parking to residents. Ellicott City did not. Luckily my good friends the Heasleys were willing to help me move. We had to park the moving truck in a parking lot two blocks from the building. Furniture was carried down the railroad tracks, over Main Street and behind three other buildings to get to 8016 Main Street. Now those are good friends.

Our apartment was the seventh and eighth windows from the right in this photo - above the space between the two red cars.

Here is the railroad bridge. The moving van was parked on the other end of the building to the right. We carried the furniture along the railroad tracks, over the bridge, down a narrow passageway behind the building, and into the apartment.

The apartment was one room wide. The second floor of the building was our main floor. There was an entrance from Main Street that would take us up a narrow flight of stairs with a sharp turn at the top. Our first floor consisted of a small living room, small dining room and a kitchen. There was a dishwasher that we always used for storage. The deck out the back went into what could euphemistically be called a garden. A staircase in the dining room plus a staircase on the deck would take you to the third floor where there were actually three bedrooms and a bath. The center one had a skylight and no window and the deck on the back also opened onto ground level. It was quaint, it was charming, and it was fun.

The first morning we discovered that the train tracks were still active. At 6:00 a train goes rumbling by vibrating the 18 inch thick granite walls much to our surprise. It’s amazing, though, how quickly you learn not to hear a 6 a.m. train.

Downtown historic Ellicott City has always been an extremely active area. There were many restaurants within walking distance. There was Leidig’s Bakery and since I now lived just down the street from Leidig’s I was the designated donut picker upper for the office. People always insisted on Leidig’s donuts.

The Patapsco River flowed just next door and in 1972, Tropical Storm Agnes wreaked destruction on Ellicott City. The high water mark is still tacked to a telephone pole. The water level would have reached the second floor for our building.

Parking was always an issue. We could never park on the street for more than two hours at a time. If we were lucky, we’d be able to grab a spot on the street just as the parking enforcement time expired for the evening or we’d have to park in one of the three public parking lots. One was one block away, one was two blocks away, and one halfway up Main Street which was quite a haul with groceries.

Jim and Connie threw me a surprise 30th birthday party in Ellicott City. The apartment was crammed with friends and there was a huge pile of gifts. Who could help but be excited by a huge pile of gifts? Now in these days I was a bit of a clothes horse. My tiny closet was jammed with suits and shirts for work because at this time our dress code literally required “impeccable suits and dresses” and we used to joke that ISD stood for that. The back of my closet door had a tie rack on it with ties arranged by color – probably numbering over 100. Jim actually used to jokingly give tours of my ties when some of his friends would come over.

Back to the party. As I looked through the pile of gifts of all different shapes and sizes I started opening them. Much to my surprise the first package contained a tie but the package did not look like it. And it was difficult to maintain a look of “Oh how nice, what a lovely tie” because it was certainly not to my taste. As I opened the second gift Barry starts to catch on. Again, no indication of what’s inside but there is in fact yet another ugly tie in the package. Not only had they managed to pull off a surprise party with absolutely no inkling of what was going on but they managed to pull a practical joke on me. Each tie was uglier than the last. We turned it into a contest. Many of these ties had come from the closets of the fathers of the guests and had to be returned because they were being worn. Some came from thrift shops but the winner came from Marlene Langdon, the mother of one of my friends, Tracy, who is now living in Tucson. Marlene managed to find a tie that was brown velour that when tied looked like you had a huge fist at your throat. The party was a huge hit and one of the most memorable birthday parties I have ever had.

Moving out was just as interesting as moving in. I was to be moving to the Carriage House on the grounds of the church – more later on that. As I was coming down the stairs from the bedroom level for the last time, I made the mistake of thinking “Oh, let me just roll this bag of clothes down the steps and it will land safely at the bottom.” Instead it took a bad bounce on the way down the steps and punched a big hole in the wallboard. Luckily Jim’s brother was quite adept at fixing this sort of thing and it was not a problem at inspection time.

Jim was in the apartment for several months longer. As we were doing final cleanup I’m walking down the stairs and Jim turns around and notices that the bottom of the box I’m carrying is ready to collapse. Unfortunately in this box is the remainder of the can of paint that was used to repair the hole in the wall that I had created. And, no, I was not at the bottom of the steps. I was near the top. This can of paint, of course, flies open, throwing paint all over the non-white stairwell which we then cleaned up madly with anything we could find. One thing I do recall was that there was a blue sports jacket in the box which mopped up some of the paint quite well. In the meantime Jim and I are collapsing in hysterics but we managed to get the stairwell back in order. Life in E.C. was never a dull moment.

Local oddities

2008-06-23T23:02:00.001-04:00

Each city has it's own quirks and oddities. Baltimore has more than it's share, I'm sure. One I remember very clearly was in the Hess Shoe Store located in Edmondson Village. Most shoe store windows would feature shoes, of course. Not so here. Instead of shoes, live monkeys were featured. Of course, what child didn't want to go to THAT store for shoes. We'd stand there and watch them swing and play all over that window

Any oddities where you live?

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Physical therapy update

2008-06-23T22:24:00.001-04:00

Today in therapy, many of the usual exercises and a few additional ones. I practiced standing again and this time I stood for the first time for 2 min 53 seconds and the second time for 2 minutes 46 seconds. We also did an exercise like knee dips. From a standing position I would bend my knees, bend my elbows, and then pull myself back up to a standing position. I was able to do two sets of ten. We also did some medicine ball exercises sitting on the edge of a platform practicing balance, the medicine ball being thrown to me and thrown back. This was to test balance and reaction. A twist was added. When I would catch the ball I would pivot as far as possible to the left or right and from that position throw the ball back to the therapist. In another new one today a patient table would be placed in front of me. The therapist would place their foot at a given position. I would push the table to that point to test my ability to extend and bend over. They would move their foot further away to see how far I could bend and extend. The last was a new Wii game called Boxing Training. For those of you that recall with horror Dodge ball from elementary school, what this really resembled was someone throwing a ball at you and you needed to react to duck it. Unfortunately I felt like I was back in elementary school. I was hit more times than I was missed. At one point multiple balls were being thrown at a time. That was the end of therapy today.

Chemotherapy starts tonight

2008-06-23T22:23:00.001-04:00

My second course of chemotherapy will begin this evening and continue for five nights. 300 mg of Temodar in the hopes that it will continue to shrink the tumors as the first course appears to have done. There was no noticeable adverse reaction to my first course so anticipating the same this time.

Teamwork

2008-06-23T22:19:00.005-04:00

Throughout my career I worked with a number of teams, each usually associated with a different software product. The first team that I worked with was the COMMS team. COMMS was an acronym for Community Online Materials Management System. It was the first online system that had been developed by our organization and was already under development when I started. My first manager was Steve Boehk who is also still working for Ascension Health. After Steve moved from Project Leader to Technical Services, a new implementation team was formed. What I learned from that initial development team proved invaluable in my future career. So hats off to Steve for being such a great manager and teacher.

After the software team completed programming and testing we moved into implementation in the Daughters of Charity hospitals that were part of the Northeast and Southeast Provinces. This new implementation team consisted of Howard Allen, myself, Mary Ann Corkran, now a CIO at Johns Hopkins University (I still keep in touch with Mary Ann), and Kathy Egner. We spent several years implementing the system in thirteen hospitals. We got to know each other so well and traveled together so often and dined together so much that people began to assume we were two married couples. At one point in time it had been determined that I had spent more of Mary Ann’s wedding anniversaries with her than her husband Rich. When I was talking to Mary Ann the other day, she started to relay a story to me that I immediately recalled. We were in Binghamton, New York at the Holiday Inn Arena downtown. It had been a very long day and we had stopped at the hotel lounge. I never really was much of a drinker but I suppose that evening I may have had one too many. We must have gone through multiple bowls of Tostitos which both Mary Ann and I specifically recalled and at one time I looked up and Howard, Mary Ann and Kathy were staring at me in horror. Apparently I had been laughing and had thrown my head back, hit it on the corner of a brick wall, and didn’t feel a thing. We all called it an evening after that.

In another memorable situation it turned out that one of the original development programmers had a bit more of a sense of humor than any of us knew. Before Rosie left the organization she had been working on a particular function that required a high level of difficulty to complete appropriately. Before she left I asked her assurances that this was completed. Rosie assured me that it was. A week later I was looking at the code and noticed that she had inserted a comment that said, “And then a miracle occurs.” She had in fact not completed the code. I was left with the responsibility of creating that miracle in Assembler Level Macro Code where our largest program had to be 16K or under. Yes, that does say K. But Rosie wasn’t done yet. We got a phone call one day from one of our users complaining about an error message that had come up on the screen. We said, “What message are you talking about?” and she said, “The turkey message.” We said, “The turkey message?” Normally when you want to relay an error to a user you use the politest language possible. Rosie had decided that this particular error would be so egregious that the message said, “You can’t do that, you turkey.” We had to remove that message immediately but it lives on in infamy.

My next team was my Baltimore MedSeries4 team. This consisted of Dave Galloway, George Walker, Bill Manwarring, and myself. By this time I was managing two teams, the COMMS team and the MedSeries4 team. The four of us were installing MedSeries4 in the same facilities where we had previously installed COMMS. In Pottsville, Pennsylvania we went to the same diner every morning. The server would see us pull up and within minutes of walking in the door our orders were already on the table because we had the same thing for breakfast every day. We often fell into the trap in the evenings of saying, “Oh we’ll get out in time for dinner. Let’s not go to the cafeteria.” Of course we never did and we’d end up eating out of the snack machines – usually cheese crackers. After a while for some reason we started referring to the cheese crackers as turkey sandwiches. But not everyone caught on. One evening Dave said, “I’m about to go get some turkey sandwiches, anybody want any?” And Bill pipes up, “You know I don’t get it. You say that every night and you always come back with cheese crackers.” Bills energy level would wane quickly as the week wore on. Both of these teams would work so hard and learn so much in those times that I know they have all progressed to excellent careers.

Perhaps the largest and most diverse team that I have worked with is the team that grew from two people in 1990 to nine people by the time I transitioned to supply Chain in 2007. This was the MedSeries4 team for the East Central Province, later combined with the OmniBuyer implementation team.

Back row: Jan Clark, Barry, Jim Hook, Linda Clemmer, Cindy Hawes
Front row: Maddie Vecchi, Cathy Riley, Scott Culiver

COMMS had been installed in the Daughters of Charity East Central province also but was going to be replaced by MedSeries4 as it had been in the Northeast and Southeast. Jim Hook and I began that process in 1990. At the time I was living in Baltimore, Jim was in Evansville, Indiana and we would travel to the various sites to do the implementations. As our support base grew, Maddie Vecchi joined us in 1994. Maddie lived in Salt Lake City. Over the years we added Jan Clark now in Bend, Oregon, and Cathy Riley from Salt Lake. Maddie, Jan and Cathy were all from the MedSeries4 organization so they were a perfect fit for our team. In 2001 Ascension Health Supply Chain reviewed their data requirements for products and contract analysis and embarked on a project to put an Internet-based requisitioning/workflow system as an overlay in all Ascension Health facilities. The product was OmniBuyer and our team became the implementation team for the product across the country. We added Scott Culiver, Linda Clemmer, and Cindy Hawes all in Evansville. All three of these individuals transitioned from other positions in ISD to join the team. A few years ago Tarun Gulati, now in Chicago, also joined our team. Unfortunately Tarun is not in the team picture that is featured at the top of this section.

Please note, all four time zones of the United States are represented on this team. I believe there may still be team members that have not met in person. Of all the teams I have worked with, my proudest professional moments have been with this incredible group of people. Juggling twenty-four hour on-call for multiple systems for nearly every Ascension facility across the country, handling support issues for well over ten thousand users, developing new processes and procedures, this team never failed to step up to a challenge and continues to do so to this day.

Shortly after we were transitioned from Ascension Health ISD to CSC, I did not feel fulfilled in my role as a CSC manager. I went to my manager Sondra Schoenbaum and asked if there was some sort of solution we could determine. Scott had significant previous management experience. We were able to affect a trade in jobs. Scott became my manager and took over the management of this outstanding team of people.

I do have many amusing stories about this team but I will list those separately because there are too many and God knows this has gone on long enough. I realize that this is a very long entry but nothing of value is completed in a vacuum. I wanted to acknowledge and thank all of those team members over the years that I have worked with and that have had such a significant impact on my career. I pray I have had an impact on theirs.

Just about the biggest dog I've ever seen

2008-06-22T20:15:00.000-04:00

I was visiting with my sister, Tina today when someone walks in the door that I recognize, but somehow seemed out of place. It was one of night shift nurses, Lisa. She was dressed in casual clothes and was accompanied by the largest dog I think I have ever seem.

Jackson, her Labrador/Great Dane mix is five years old, pure black, and weighs one hundred fifty eight pounds. Even with my bed raised, he was taller than the bed. He appeared to be the size of a small horse. He was also very gentle and like nearly every dog on earth, just wanted some love.
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Regional foods

2008-06-21T21:16:00.003-04:00

Every region of the country has its own specialty food products. You don’t really realize it, though until you move away. Some of the things that I discovered were uniquely Baltimore or at least mid-Atlantic were Utz potato chips, Old Bay seafood seasoning (now available nationwide), Tastykakes (a local Hostess snack cakes type product, my favorite being Butterscotch Krimpets, Peanut Butter Tandy Takes, and the fruit pies), G&M crab cakes (now available online), and Berger cookies – imagine a large vanilla wafer slathered in chocolate fudge frosting (also now available online). But the penultimate is Rheb’s candies. Whenever I would return to Baltimore I would stock up on these goodies to take back to Jacksonville.

Surprisingly enough, a few months ago, I found Tastykakes in our local Publix. A month later, they were in the clearance section. Regional foods truly are regional. Another time in Chicago on a sub shop delivery menu under desserts it listed “Tastykakes available.” I was surprised to see that. But back to Rheb’s.

When I started working for the Daughters of Charity Eastern Cooperative Services Information Systems Division, the building was located on the grounds of St. Agnes hospital, a member of Ascension Health. Luckily it was about two years before I knew Rheb’s was across the street. The factory is still located in the original building, the basement of a row house. The candies are still made by hand and when you go in the store you can buy prepackaged or you can select every single piece you want to put in that box. And the selection is huge.

They are legendary for their lines out the door at holidays. They used to have to cut off guaranteed Christmas orders by Labor Day. And if you braved the line at the holidays it could take hours to get your order and when the chocolate ran out the store was closed. It was not unusual for people to place orders of twenty to thirty pounds, particularly at Christmas. A gift of Rheb’s meant you went to some effort.

The longevity of the employees is legendary. The last time I was in the store in December 2007 the daughter of the original owner was still working behind the counter. For the longest time it was cash or check only but they now have a web site and will ship, weather permitting. If it is too warm they will refuse to ship so as not to compromise the quality of the product.

I have often taken Rheb’s across the country as gifts. Many people feel that it is better than Mrs. Sees and other nationally known specialty brands. Since they’re currently not shipping due to the warm weather, I can’t even confirm the price but I believe that it is around $15 per pound. Best chocolate bargain in the country.

This topic of regional foods came up because I have had so many recent visitors from Baltimore. Many of these products have found their way to my room and just as quickly, unfortunately, have had to go home. Before they were sent home I did savor and sample them and shared them with my guests and visitors. But temptation is just too great. As a diabetic, my glucose levels are carefully monitored.

Since I have traveled around the country so much to our various facilities I have sampled some of your regional products. What are the ones that are dear to your hearts?

Cleo and Tootsie

2008-06-21T21:12:00.003-04:00

I realized I had forgotten to put a picture of Cleo and Tootsie, Wendy’s goldens. These are the goldens that the staff are referring to as the Bush’s Baked Bean dogs. Both very gentle dogs. Simon gets along with them very well but Margo gets a jealous streak once in a while. Cleo is on the left and Tootsie on the right. (Click the photo for a larger version.)

Weekend visitor and a classic story

2008-06-20T23:08:00.001-04:00

My sister, Tina, arrived for a weekend visit this afternoon from Baltimore. We had a great evening of visiting and reminiscing. One of the funniest stories I have about Tina is about the wedding ceremony for her second marriage. I was flying in from a business trip and would just make it in time to the wedding. A friend was picking me up at the airport. This same friend often dropped me off. Like many airports, Baltimore-Washington International Airport has arrivals on the lower level and departures above. Imagine a long shot view of me on the lower level wondering where my ride is and my ride on the upper level wondering where their passenger was. Of course, there were no cell phones in those days. We finally figured out what happened, I got picked up and whisked off to the wedding just in time to see the bride and groom coming back down the aisle.

The reception was going to be a BBQ at Tina's home. It took Tina a very long time to get to the party. I just assumed she got held up with pictures or something.

The next week, I'm shopping at the Giant grocery store (store name not size). As I'm checking out, I notice something very unusual a few checkouts away and commented on it to the cashier. She remarked "That's nothing. You should have been here last week. A woman in a wedding dress with twin flower girls (my nieces Jessica and Vicki) was in line buying hot dog and hamburger buns".

I finally figured out at that moment why it took Tina so long to get to the party. :)

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Garden sign

2008-06-20T22:38:00.000-04:00

It seems appropriate to put this note on the blog just after the pictures of the garden have been posted. Grandmother Cronise had a garden sign in her garden near what we always called the "Ice Plant". I have no clue what that plant really was. Mom had one in her garden in the roses. There was one at our church at the entrance to what used to be a formal garden that became a Meditation Garden and where Easter Sunrise services would be held. I never seemed to find the perfect one for our garden. This past year, I was working on a project at Providence Hospital in Washington, D.C. I was able to get together with two of my dear friends in Baltimore, Jim, our blogmaster and Connie from my church in Baltimore. My 50th birthday was this past year and we decided to celebrate. We went to the Inner Harbor for dinner then went to see a Baltimore Christmas tradition, the Christmas lights on one block of row homes in Hampden. Each home on the block is covered roof to sidewalk with lights, extensive decorations and music fills the streets. Afterwards, we stopped at Connie's house for dessert. Connie gave me a package and I opened it up. It was the garden sign. I was so moved, I literally broke down into tears. I didn't realize I must have mentioned to Connie I couldn't find one I wanted. Before anyone asks, I'm ashamed to say it never occurred to me to look on the web. Duh. Jim remarked to Connie, "I think he likes it". The sign is in the back garden by the stone wall that Rick and I actually helped build. Whenever I see the sign, I think of Grandmother, Mom, our church and now Connie. The sign reads:

The kiss of the sun for pardon
The song of the birds for mirth
One is nearer God's heart in a garden
Than anywhere else on earth
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Cassie and Cricket

2008-06-20T17:12:00.000-04:00

When Mom and my sister Chris came for their visit earlier this week, Cassie and Cricket came along. Here is a picture of these two beautiful Shelties. Cassie is on the left, Cricket on the right. Cassie does have two different colors eyes. Chris does pet therapy at two nursing homes in Baltimore and also takes them to Port Discovery Childrens Museum.

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Margo and Simon

2008-06-20T06:21:00.005-04:00

I have been remiss in getting some a photo of Margo and Simon on the blog. They have been mentioned repeatedly but many of you have never seen them. Margo (the cocker spaniel) is named for the Bette Davis character Margo Channing from "All About Eve". We sometimes think Miss Davis' imperious temperament may be in Margo. Simon (the beagle) is named that just because we liked the name. They are both four years old with Margo being just a few months older.

Like most brothers and sisters, they both love and torture each other at times.

They both provide such joy in our lives even when Margo won't go out in the rain or when Simon decides to do a beagle bark much too early in the morning. (Click on any of the pictures for a larger version.)

Care planning meeting

2008-06-19T23:35:00.003-04:00

Rick and I attended my care plan/discharge meeting today. At this meeting all those involved in your care discuss progress or issues. The social worker is there, the nurse is there, and of course the therapist. They indicated that they feel that there is still opportunity for improvement, that they have seen definite progress and that they feel that I am putting forth appropriate effort.

With the insurance company approving continued rehab on a weekly basis it’s always possible that I could actually have 48 hours notice that it will be time to go home. To that end, we have scheduled a home assessment for next week assuming we’re able to get a ramp constructed in time. This visit would entail Rick picking me up in our car and going over to the house. Rehab center staff would be with us and they would asses the appropriateness of the house layout.

Rick and I had the opportunity at the care planning meeting to ask any questions that we had and the staff was able to provide all the answers that we needed.

Physical therapy update

2008-06-19T23:32:00.001-04:00

In physical therapy today we did some standing in the parallel bars. The first time I was able to stand for one minute and forty-two seconds, and the second time for a minute and fifty seconds. The intent is to get the legs used to bearing weight and to not use the arms too much to support yourself.

For my weight exercises I was able to move up from 2 lb to 3 lb weights. I know that doesn’t sound like much but they seem pleased with progress.

The therapists feel that my upper body strength is improving but combining the therapy does make for an exhausting afternoon.

On the street where we live

2008-06-19T23:04:00.020-04:00

While Jim was visiting this weekend he took pictures of the house, the gardens and our general neighborhood. Jacksonville is a beautiful city to live in and Rick and I are fortunate to live in a historic district called Avondale. The neighborhood is architecturally diverse, dating to the 1920s. After having lived in a building across the street from the first railroad terminus in the country in Ellicott City, Maryland - a town dating back to the late 1700’s - a house built in 1924 that is considered historic kind of amuses me. Our particular home is an American style bungalow that Rick originally purchased for the wrap-around porch and the enormous live oak in the back yard. It took me a number of years to translate northern gardening to Florida gardening but both Grandmother and Mom instilled a love of flowers and gardening in me. Each year as I plant our gardens I think of theirs. A few photos follow of the house with some focus on the gardens. The hydrangea on the corner is over twenty-five years old.

There have been times when I went crazy planting the front gardens – one year planting 450 four-inch impatiens in an intricate pattern. While beautiful, I will never do that again. This year I planted borders of red and purple miniature pentas, multiple shades of geraniums with spreading pentas behind them.

(Note: Click any of the following photos for a larger view.)

Here are some photos that show our back yard.

Around the corner from our house are the shoppes of Avondale. The shoppes include six different restaurants including one of our favorites, the Fox, which is just an old-fashioned diner with wonderful food. If you’re not there in time on the weekends you’ll be in a line of 15-20 people waiting to get in.

Another is The Brick which has the closest to Maryland crab cakes that I have found in Jacksonville. The remaining shoppes are a mix that appeal to the ladies who lunch or those looking or something unique from a local specialty shop.

The St. John’s River is a few blocks from our home but and many of the streets have direct access to it. These shots were taken from Edgewood Avenue which is a gracious larger cross street with a park-like median. At the river’s edge you are able to see downtown Jacksonville.

Over the recent years downtown has experienced a bit of revitalization with a number of condo and apartment towers being built and a few shots of downtown are included. All of this is just to give you a sense of where we live.

Mom and Chris update

2008-06-19T23:02:00.000-04:00

I just received a call a little while ago that my mother and sister Chris did make it safely home from their motor home trip to visit me.

Canine visitation

2008-06-19T20:11:00.000-04:00

I may be setting a record for canine visitors. So far I've had Margo and Simon (our cocker and beagle), Toostie and Cleo (Wendy's goldens), Spurrier (Michelle's pug). Cassie and Cricket (my sister Chris' Shelties) and now Chin and Bruder (Chuck and Ron's Shih Tzu and standard Schnauzer). Nine canines so far and counting. I know a few more will be here soon for a visit also. All have been well behaved and certainly have brightened my days. WOOF!!!!
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A message from Rick

2008-06-19T07:14:00.001-04:00

Barry is correct. We will make the most of each day. A wheelchair ramp is being planned for easy access to the house. It will be built in the back garden area. We think that is an appropriate location so Barry can enjoy the garden as he enters and exits the house. Also, it will provide him the opportunity to make certain I am keeping the garden in shape!

I had a nice visit with Barry's mom and sister Chris. I understand where Barry gets his strength and courage. I am so proud of Barry's determination to gain as much mobility and independence as possible. He takes his PT seriously and I know he will reach his maximum medical improvement soon.

Each one of you has been a Godsend with your prayers and good wishes. Barry is truly blessed to have you in his life.

Rick

Mom and Chris

2008-06-19T00:00:00.001-04:00

Mom and my sister Chris will start their trip back to Baltimore tomorrow. Chris has two Shelties, Cassie and Cricket. I think they have visited everyone in the rehab center and on several instances requests for visits for particular rooms were conveyed.

Margo and Simon have not been around lots of other dogs, so it was a great surprise (and relief) when all four played together beautifully. Whew

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Appointment with the oncologist

2008-06-18T23:10:00.002-04:00

I did have my appointment with the oncologist this morning despite being stopped by CSX freight trains twice on the way. I had a stop in the lab first for blood work where every reading was perfect. Typically when I go to a physician’s office I have a really bad case of white coat syndrome and my blood pressure is usually elevated. When I take it at home, it’s fine. When the physician’s assistant took my blood pressure today it was 110/70 so I was in a relatively calm state of mind.

My oncologist is the regional melanoma specialist and we’ve always had a very open, honest and frank relationship. As Dr. Guthrie examined me he determined that there had been some shrinking of the lymph nodes that had originally been of concern. The four day chemotherapy regimen that I followed earlier appears to have had some positive effect. My oncologist does feel, given the other circumstances that I’m dealing with - the rehab, that continuing the chemotherapy regimen is the most appropriate option for me and I concur.

When I first was diagnosed with metastatic melanoma in 2006 I knew there was a possibility that it could recur and that I would not experience a normal life span. That does now appear to be more of a likelihood. Cures for melanoma that have entered other body systems are rare. The fact that the chemotherapy will be of some benefit does not mean that it is likely to be a cure.

During the appointment Rick was with me as well as a co-worker of Rick’s, Dr. Reuben Brigety. Reuben has been an excellent resource to us, helping us with questions. At the conclusion of the exam I did ask Dr. Guthrie, if the Temodar continues to be successful, what time frame am I likely looking at. His straightforward answer was nine to twelve months.

After the appointment as I was waiting for the transport van to take me back to the rehab center, Rick and I were sitting in the lobby of the medical building for about twenty minutes. I am not on this journey alone. Rick is being as strong for me as I am attempting to be strong for him.

Let me be clear, this does not mean that Barry is giving up. This does not mean that Barry is going to stop fighting this. What it does mean is that Barry needs to understand the parameters that now surround his life.

I continue to draw incredible strength from all the emails, phone calls, blog comments, and cards. Those of you that know me well, particularly in the Supply Chain office, know that in the True Colors personality profile I am high green (very data driven) and dealing with this in a green fashion is the only way that makes sense to me.

While this is certainly not the news I had hoped to receive, it is the news I expected to receive. My sense of humor is still intact. My zest and joy for life is here and not going anywhere. Each day is going to be lived to the fullest.

There certainly have been positive elements to this journey. I have had the opportunity to truly discover how many lives I have touched even when I was not aware of it. I have developed an inner peace that I didn’t realize was possible. I also always feel as if I am surrounded by the thoughts and prayers of all of you that are part of this journey with me.

Physical therapy update

2008-06-18T23:04:00.001-04:00

I have now been assigned to different physical therapists, Manny and Rachel. My occupational and physical therapy will be combined into an afternoon session. So now I have the luxury of staying in bed until lunch if I choose.

Today I did some standing with the parallel bars. Both Manny and Rachel are Filipino. It’s unusual for me to be called tall but both of them said, “How tall are you?” I said, “I’m five ten and a half. I’m not that tall.” But they said, “You’re taller than we are.”

One of the exercises was doing sit-ups. I had to laugh because I could never do sit-ups when I was healthy. These were modified sit-ups with cushions under the back to try to strengthen the abdominal muscles. I did some additional leg exercises, too, and my therapy session this afternoon was probably about three hours.

Therapy today

2008-06-17T22:24:00.000-04:00

I had three therapy sessions today and am more tired today than usual. What was added today was something called the standing table. This device is designed to cause you to stand without you having to exert your own effort. It’s almost like a mini-elevator. The focus is to get your legs used to being in a standing position again. So they roll my chair up to it, literally put a winch under my butt, lift me to a standing position, and I hold onto the table top. I did this for two different five-minute sessions. Even though I didn’t think I was exerting effort, it did in fact tire my legs.

Mom and Chris today

2008-06-17T22:23:00.000-04:00

Each time Chris enters the facility with her shelties Cassie and Cricket she has met with requests to go to specific rooms. These are two very well behaved dogs. They did have the opportunity today to meet and play with Margo and Simon. Margo is always cautious meeting new dogs. Rick was very surprised that all four dogs got along famously playing well together in the back yard.

Mom and Chris spent a comfortable evening in Chris’s motor home and visited me this evening. We had a great time telling old stories and I’ll see them again tomorrow evening. Not sure what specific plans they have for the day tomorrow.

Aunt Naomi as Mae West

2008-06-17T22:21:00.003-04:00

I had mentioned in an earlier post that Aunt Naomi had sent a picture of herself as Mae West. I thought it would be interesting for eveyone to include a copy of it here. Click the image for a larger version.

I love New York

2008-06-17T12:09:00.003-04:00

I’ve always had a bit of a love affair with New York City, and I’ll get into a lot more detail about trips to New York Rick and I have taken over the years.

My initial trip to New York was when I was still in high school in 1975. A friend of Tracy and mine, Joe, had family in New York, his grandmother and his aunt. Joe invited Tracey and me to accompany him on the train to New York for the weekend. Mom and Dad said “Yes,” and I was ecstatic. When we arrived in New York, Joe took us all over the city by subway. We went to the Bronx Zoo, we saw all the major sights, but the thing I remember the most was seeing my first Broadway Show. It was at the Palace Theatre. It was called “Goodtime Charlie” and starred Joel Gray and Carol Reinking in her Broadway debut as Joan of Arc.

As we were standing in the theater lobby, I remember looking around and, much to our surprise, we see “the other Mrs. Jones.” In our high school, the mother of one of our friends, Cathy Jones, worked there, but there was also another Mrs. Jones who worked in the office. So it was a bit of a surprise in the middle of a crowded theater to find someone that we knew. After seeing that show, I was hooked.

I visited New York many other times for sightseeing. Once in college, my art history class went to New York for the day. We of course went to all of the museums and several of us decided to stop in a restaurant for dinner before heading back on the bus. After we were seated and saw the prices on the menu, we had to discreetly stand up and leave the restaurant. After all, we were all on college students’ budget. We ended up eating, much to my chagrin, at Tad’s Steakhouse. Any of you who have ever been to New York know that it probably would have been better if we had gone to McDonald’s.

Years later, another friend of ours, Kas, worked for NBC News. I was working at our hospital in Bridgeport, Connecticut. Kas and I arranged an evening on the town. We got tickets to “Gypsy” with Tyne Daily the night before she received the Tony Award in 1990. We had dinner at a Manhattan restaurant, and then went to the Carlisle Hotel to hear Bobby Short. It was the quintessentially perfect New York evening.

Subequently, Rick and I have been to New York many, many times, but those stories will be saved for another entry.

We now interrupt the regularly scheduled blog entry...

2008-06-16T22:21:00.001-04:00

As I was talking to Jim this evening dictating tonight’s blog entry I happened to notice a dog leash coming in the door. It was low to the ground and I’m thinking, “Who in the world is bringing a dog into my room at 8:30 at night?” Well it turns out my mother and my sister drove from Baltimore this morning in my sister’s new motor home to surprise me with a visit. I had no clue they were even thinking about coming down. Mom had told me she was going to be in West Virginia for a couple of days at their cabin. The two dogs are my sister Chris’s shelties that she often takes to nursing facilities as therapy dogs. It was wonderful to see both Mom and Chris. We had a nice visit for about an hour and they’ll be here for several days.

Just in case anyone is wondering, members of my family do actually drive regular vehicles since so far we’ve had a visit from a motorcycle and a motor home.

Sorry tonight’s entry is so short, but Jim and I will pick up with my original plan tomorrow.

Physical therapy and upcoming appointments

2008-06-16T22:19:00.003-04:00

Physical therapy

This morning in the continuation of upper body exercises a new twist was when Deb indicated we were going to the parallel bars. I was a little confused because morning is more occupational therapy and afternoon is physical therapy concentrating on legs. What we ended up doing was practicing standing. I was able to push myself out of the chair and transfer my hands to the parallel bars which were a little higher. On the first attempt I was able to stand for 40 seconds. On the second attempt I was able to stand for 60 seconds. My right leg continues to lag behind the left. Locking the knee in place is part of the difficulty.

In afternoon therapy, I continued practicing transfers with and without a sliding board (a board that serves as a bridge from one surface to another. You slide your body from bed to chair, chair to bed). Non sliding board transfers involve standing pivoting and sitting. I also used the Omnicycle again. The right leg which I am concentrating on with the bike went from 16% effort to 22% effort so I am continuing to see some incremental improvement in the right leg.

Important appointments and meetings this week

I do have a doctor appointment on Wednesday with my oncologist. It is anticipated that we will be discussing treatment plans for the melanoma and details of the most recent PET scan. On Thursday, Rick and I will be meeting with the rehab center staff to get an overall evaluation of progress since my arrival. They call it a discharge planning meeting which of course concerned me at first until we realized exactly what the meeting entails.

Results of both the oncology appointment and the planning meeting will be discussed on the web later in the week.

Weekend physical therapy

2008-06-15T19:27:00.001-04:00

I don't have scheduled therapy on the weekend, but each of my therapists has suggested exercises I can do unassisted. Light weights allow me to continue to improve upper body strength. A better understanding of the muscles that need the most improvement in my legs help me to target them specifically. I'm certain many of my guests this weekend didn't realize I was exercising my legs while they were visiting.
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Surrounded by love

2008-06-15T17:08:00.001-04:00

What a weekend. I literally felt as if I was surrounded by love all weekend. Between two wonderful friends Jim and Jim coming to visit from Baltimore, Rick bringing Margo and Simon for a visit Saturday, visits from Chuck and Ron, Mike and Mike, Steve and Ben and Leslie (a former St. Vincent's Jacksonville colleague going back 28 years) it was a busy weekend here. More emails, blog comments, cards and phone calls added to the busy weekend. And every bit of it felt great. I continue to be humbled by the outpouring of support and encouragement and strengthened by it. My thanks to all for your prayers.
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A funny Birthday Card

2008-06-14T22:01:00.003-04:00

Grandmother Cronise sent so many cards that one year my birthday card was signed "Katherine Cronise" but was also signed (Grandmother) after she realized what she had done. We laughed about that for a LONG time.

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A ministry of cards

2008-06-14T21:03:00.000-04:00

Early this morning I was going through all the cards that I have received over the past few weeks. There are literally more than I can count. It reminded me of a tribute that someone paid to Grandmother Cronise after she passed. Grandmother would send cards to people in church for birthdays, get-well, all different kinds of occasions. About two months after Grandmother’s funeral, one of the church members had something published in our monthly church newsletter. He made the comment that for the rest of his life his birthday would not be the same because for as many years as he could remember he had received a birthday card from my grandmother. In this small way she had touched this man’s heart with this simple gesture. As I look through all the cards again today, I thank you again for your words of strength, humor, compassion, and encouragement.

A day of visitors

2008-06-14T21:01:00.000-04:00

Jim and Jim arrived from Baltimore last night. Their arrival into Jacksonville was slightly marred by late arrival at the gate and a valet at the hotel who hit their car. Luckily the damage is minor and the hotel, of course, it taking responsibility for it. A great day of reminiscing and visiting and picture gathering to start putting some more pictures out on the blog.

Therapy

2008-06-13T15:17:00.001-04:00

This morning in PT the upper body strengthening continues. In chair push ups I was able to do full arm extension on 14 of 15 attempts. I have never been able to do even three before.

I also have some additional exercises that I can do on the weekend so the time is more productive.

Margo and Simon

2008-06-13T15:16:00.000-04:00

Rick brought in a picture of Margo and Simon for me to have at my bedside. Already staff are asking about them. One of the social workers the other day mentioned that she also had a beagle. Incredibly enough, she got hers from the same breeder where we found Simon. It will be interesting to see if they resemble each other.

This weekend

2008-06-13T15:15:00.000-04:00

Two friends are coming down from Baltimore to visit this weekend. Jim (blogmaster) and Jim (not blogmaster). It will be great to see them again.

Thursday therapy

2008-06-12T23:20:00.001-04:00

Radiation today was my final radiation treatment. I received a certificate suitable for framing indicating that I had completed a radiation treatment program at Baptist Medical Center. There are also three tiny tattooed dots somewhere on my chest that indicate the parameters of treatment.

Therapy this morning included using the Wii. I did all the regular therapy so this was a welcome diversion. This afternoon I was on the parallel bars again. I went down the bars twice. The therapist did a lot of leg work today but none on the omnicycle. He also showed me some exercises that I can do on weekends when therapy does not take place.

When I came back from the morning session I discovered that my mattress had been replaced by an air controlled mattress to assist in healing the bedsores which are progressing well.

It's official

2008-06-12T23:16:00.000-04:00

On Thursday June 26 Rick is officially retiring. He has worked for the state of Florida for over 30 years and has decided that this is an appropriate time to retire to devote efforts to my recovery and my care. He was at the office today cleaning and packing up, talking to staff. I know he’ll be sorely missed there but greatly welcomed at home. Rick is 59 and so he could have continued to work for a number of years but has chosen the path that he feels is most appropriate.

Bush's Baked Beans

2008-06-12T23:15:00.000-04:00

So far there have been five dogs to visit – Margo and Simon of course, Spurrier, a pug belonging to one of our friends Michelle, and of course Wendy’s two goldens. Whenever Rick comes in to visit, people ask, “Where’s the Bush’s Baked Bean dogs?” Of the five dogs, the goldens are the ones that the staff remembers.